#maybe in a fourth full crossover movie

[dr-feline]

I found a plot hole in the Princess Switch 3. Simon (from Christmas Prince) was at Hunter Cunard’s party, but who was that girl he was with? We know that movie takes place after the 3rd Christmas Prince as King Richard and Queen Amber were at Queen Margaret’s Coronation with their baby in the 2nd Princess Switch. And at the end of the 3rd Christmas Prince Simon proposes to Melissa. So again I ask the question who was that girl at the party with him?!?

[kylesvariouslistsandstuff]

The current head of 20th Century Studios - Steve Asbell - reveals some of the chessboard for their future, sure to stuff the big Disney slate...

There's a follow-up to this year's PLANET OF THE APES movie, the fourth in the current series that began w/ 2011's RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES. KINGDOM-OTPOTA made about 2.4-2.5x its $160m budget. Not bad. I just find it kind of curious how Disney looked at Pixar's ELEMENTAL, which also made around 2.5x its budget... And now seems to consider it a flop of sorts, and subsequently cracked down on Pixar's creative process. With leader Pete Docter often saying in recent interviews that they're attempting to tell more "universal" stories and appeal to audiences. Just an aside, that kinda low-key frustrates me, but whatever- moving on, an ALIEN: ROMULUS follow-up is also being worked on to no one's shock, and there's a script for a MASTER AND COMMANDER prequel sitting around in addition to more Agatha Christie adaptations following last year's A HAUNTING IN VENICE... Former Fox is franchise-stacked...

But the most curious development centers on the PREDATOR franchise. PREDATOR: BADLANDS, the new Dan Trachtenberg-directed installment in the series (he had previously directed PREY), was mentioned, but a secret other PREDATOR movie was made by Trachtenberg under our noses and will release some time before BADLANDS does. BADLANDS took BLADE's 11/7/2025 date, so... I'm guessing this thing, rumored to be an animated (!!) anthology film split into three segments set across different time periods, will be a Hulu release... But PREDATOR going animated and omnibus, a la THE ANIMATRIX...

A live-action movie franchise dipping into the animation waters? Now that's neat. Has happened before, but it's still very cool nonetheless, especially with an adult-oriented property.

One other detail I caught in THR's report was a mention of a James L. Brooks comedy opening next year... Well, that must be ELLA MCCAY then! So that tells me that that film fills the 9/12/2025 date Disney has on their overall movie slate. Usually they release 20th Century/Searchlight titles around that time, so... ELLA MCCAY was filmed earlier this year, and that looks to be it. Sam Raimi's SEND HELP shoots in January, so I can see that eying a 2026 release. Ditto the recently-announced READY OR NOT 2.

The KINGSMAN franchise seems all but kinda done, as indicated in the interview. Nothing new on that front. While the first two movies scored at the box office, prequel THE KING'S MAN - waylaid for two years straight by the Disney/Fox merger and COVID-19 - didn't... And I was wondering why they just didn't do the third proper movie with Taron Egerton's Eggsy and crew first, then expand that universe thereafter. And we also got that ARGYLLE thing earlier this year, which more or less didn't do much of a thing, even though director Matthew Vaughn had plans to do a full-on KINGSMAN/ARGYLLE crossover movies. I dunno, I think that series split into multiple avenues first instead of constructing a fine trilogy. KINGSMAN I found to be a solid and very fun kinetic blast, and while I enjoyed the 2nd film - THE GOLDEN CIRCLE, it was very clearly two separate movies crammed into one overstuffed mess. Ahhh well.

But it's good that 20th's future still makes room for more original, more interesting stuff, and maybe even some neat new takes on old chestnuts. Disney could certainly take cues with some of their other "brands"... Some of the best film-stuff to come out of Disney in the recent years, IMO, is 20th Century/Searchlight stuff. I was a particularly big fan of BARBARIAN and THE MENU, for starters. Hey, when's the former ever gonna get a Blu-ray release? It's been over two years now, 'yer killin' me.

[christinesficrecs]

This trainwreck of a post is dedicated to oodball-faerietales for being a kind and generous soul. You are appreciated always. 💖

Every single one of these fics is a gift which I have opened multiple times and enjoyed them every time! I did not include any fics I’ve already mentioned this year and it was SUPER hard! But you can find more favorites here. 

Wait by cutloosemcgoose | 23.4K | Explicit

Sitting on his couch, staring at the wall, it feels like Derek is watching his whole, miserable, lonely life flash before his eyes. He’s twenty four and he’s alone. No family, no friends, no real pack. He’s six days away from spending one of the most family-oriented holidays of the year trying to avoid any human interaction. If anyone could see him right now, they would tell him he looks pathetic. If Laura could see him right now, she would probably beat the crap of him and then tell him he’s a loser.

I am a HUGE fan of the woke up married trope but this fic is so much more than that!!! I should probably say that I wasn’t that impressed with the movie The Family Man but this AU is 20 times better!!! So even if you don’t care for Nick Cage or kid fics, this fic is still worth a read. Why you say?!?!! Stiles is THE perfect husband through and through. He is EVERYTHING Derek deserves and so much more! Also, I was just chatting up @dearericbittle about how much I love a great epilogue:

“Are you ready?”

“Jesus, Derek,” Stiles says, turning around so quickly that his foot catches on the rug and he almost goes flying. “You’re not supposed to see me before the wedding, it’s bad luck.”

Derek rolls his eyes at Stiles and they stare at each other for a second, wordless, before Stiles cracks up.

“Yeah, I know,” he says. Derek used to think that Stiles was mildly psychic, maybe an empath or something because of the spark, but he’s since realized that Stiles just knows him—knows all of them—so well that’s it scary and a little out-of-this-world.

“Are you ready?” he asks again. Stiles straightens the lapels of his tux, frowns down at it.

“I feel really silly wearing something so fancy to be married by an Elvis impersonator, I’d just like to say.”

“Write your congressman,” Derek advises. “Come on, we gotta go.”

Big Days by crazyassmurdererwall ( smartalli) | 9.6K

It’s an impulse really, inviting Derek to spend Thanksgiving with him and his dad. The Sheriff. Who once arrested him. It’ll be fine. Stiles is sure it’ll be fine.

This is pure gold. EVERY single thing about this fic is a gift! 

“I might have invited someone to spend Thanksgiving with us.”

He lifts one eyebrow. “You might have?”

“Yeah, no. I absolutely did.”

He may as well own up to it. Besides he’s not sorry he did, he’s just sorry he has to have this decidedly awkward conversation.

“Okay…�� John says slowly. “And do I know this person?”

“You do.” Stiles nods back, slowly. “Sort of.”

“Sort of.” His hand grasps the edge of the counter as he says, with a saintly patience born only out of years of being Stiles’ dad, “Does this person have a name?”

“They do.”

“Excellent. And their name would be…?”

Saturday Night At The Movies by aussiebee | 7.3K | Explicit

After running into Stiles at the late night movies, Derek realises just how badly Stiles is handling the post-nogitsune fallout. He knows the feeling.

Derek healing post-nogitsune Stiles with saturday night movie dates is perfect! 

Derek didn’t see much of Stiles in the days after that, but it was hard to be disappointed about it when he drove past the café on Fourth St and saw Stiles and Scott sitting inside, talking over coffee, or when he came out of the bank diagonally opposite the sheriff’s station to see Stiles and his dad sitting on the bench beneath the tree outside of it eating lunch together, both of them looking lighter than they had in months.

But then Saturday arrived again, and Stiles was letting himself into the loft, settling in against Derek’s side in his customary spot, bogarting the remote. “Spaceballs is on in twenty minutes,” he said, smelling of nerves and hope.

“I’m so excited I couldn’t hold my oil,” Derek quoted, making Stiles chuckle, the sound light and at ease.

“May the Schwartz be with you,” he responded gravely, then leaned into Derek and snuggled up close when Derek lifted an arm to drape around his shoulders.

A Walk in the Clouds by Dexterous_Sinistrous | 13.9K

The one set during WWII where Stiles is a pregnant grad student and Derek is a PTSD riddled soldier, both of them looking for a better life.

I love crossovers and AUs. Jill did such a great job with this film reboot!! 

Mieczysław couldn’t help the small smile on his lips. “You can call me Stiles,” he offered.

Derek sighed. “Stiles is certainly different than Mischief,” he stated.

“A nickname,” Stiles replied.

“Well, Stiles,” Derek started. “What if you brought home a husband?”

Stiles looked confused by Derek’s suggestion. “How could I do that? There is no one—”

“There’s me,” Derek replied.

“I— I couldn’t ask that of you,” Stiles began. “I already ruined your trip to San Francisco.”

“Maybe I was meant to be here,” Derek offered. “There seems to be a reason for me bumping into you on the train—exchanging our tickets. Getting kicked off the bus.”

“Those were all my fault,” Stiles dejectedly replied.

Derek shook his head. “Or it was fate knowing that you needed a husband for a day.”

Call Me (Cliché) by SomewheresSword | 84.6K | Mature

When the sheriff's sister ends up in a wheelchair for the duration of summer, Stiles' dreams of three months full of pack bonding, late-night video games and bro-time with Scott come crashing down. He's temporarily relocated to Redford, a three hour drive away, and he can already tell he won't be getting many visitors.

Sure the pack will forget about him while he's gone, Stiles is determined to make the most of his summer of isolation, training his body and mind - and his magic - so he can come back with a bang, and maybe catch a certain Sourwolf's eye.

Then Derek shows up at his window one night with a flimsy excuse about needing research done. Suddenly, his summer away is looking a whole lot more interesting.

When I was a young fangirl there was a series called Ever Fallen In Love With Someone. This is not that fic but the initial plot is similiar especially with the S2 vibe which gives me all the feels! 

“So, there’s this guy,” he began, anxiously reaching for a cookie and nibbling at the edge. Hannah nodded in a wordless ‘go on’ motion. “He’s… older. Dad wouldn’t like it. Or him.” Very firmly didn’t like him, as a matter of fact. Hannah’s grin widened.

“Ooh, a bad boy?” Stiles nodded — that was a bit of an understatement. “Sexy. Tell me about him.”

“He’s got these really dumb, scowly eyebrows that are about ninety percent of his facial expressions and at least fifty percent of those expressions threaten murder,” he said, the words coming before he could think to stop himself. “But he’s such a marshmallow and he doesn’t seem to realise that I can’t take him seriously anymore because I know he’s got all of the emotions. He’s so damn overprotective and sweet and he pretends like he doesn’t care about anything but it’s all lies and I just wanna give him a hug so bad because I honestly don’t know the last time someone hugged him for real.”

Tell Me, So I Know by TroubleIWant | 7.4K | Mature

It took years for Derek to finally confront the way he felt about Stiles, and even after he figured it out he could only explain in Spanish. It took them two years more to get to where they were now. Only with neither of them quite willing to commit, where exactly is that, anyways?

Well, for Stiles it’s a deserted stretch of road behind the Hale house, half trapped in a car wreck after being abducted by hunters. Frankly, he could really use Derek’s help if he’s going to get out of this alive. Mates are supposed to be able to tell when the other is in pain, right? As Derek would probably say, 'querido, no.'

Or, a love story in two parts... and two languages.

I love everything about this fic. It’s hot and beautiful with mates and polyglot Derek. So perfect! 

He trails off, knowing he can’t say amor in the next line without Stiles realizing exactly the sort of thing he’s being told.

“Holy hell,” Stiles rasps, his voice heavy with lust. Even in the low light Derek can see the pulse in his neck, the rabbit-fast tick confirming exactly how attractive Stiles finds his bilingual skills. “What was that?”

Derek shrugs. “Just something I memorized once. It reminds me of you.”

“What’s it mean?”

“It’s a parable about a sheep who pesters a wolf with too many questions and gets eaten for being so annoying.”

“Liar,” Stiles says with a smirk, but he leans back in his chair and doesn’t press the issue for the rest of the meal.

[kervinredfire]

My Other Fanfics in the Future

Well, I made announcements about my 2 Loonatics fanfics-related stories coming soon. So here are my other fanfics that I am making. But before I am going to show you my other fanfics, I like to share what most of them are like. Kervinverse related. If you checked my Tumblr header it's pretty obvious.

As you may wonder what is the Kervinverse is all about? The Kervinverse is like the multiverse but with all different kinds of Kervin. Inspired by Spiderman Into the Spiderverse all the versions of Kervin contained different personalities, stories, almost the same appearance, fighting styles, and special abilities. One of the most signature outfits is the black and red formal suit.

I already made a folder in toyhouse. However, most of it are unfinished and still ongoing.

https://toyhou.se/Kervin619/characters/folder:812137

People think that those stories a self-insert but it is actually not. Me and my other Kervins are the same but they are different the appearance, abilities, and personalities. An example is Denk Ops’s Chris Danger from the WWE games. And note that this is another long announcement for the other fanfics

So anyway, here are my Kervinverse stories that I would really like to share about Wattpad in the future. So are book covers later

KERVINVERSE STORIES (Including crossovers):

Grand Theft Auto Origins: Kervin Made Liberty – Set in the GTA HD Universe. Before Kervin (GTA Online) came to the place called San Andreas, he was just a very young boy who was born in the place called Liberty with his parents. His father Claude who became rich and retired to a life crime and his wife Misty who used to be a prostitute. It was normal and happy life for him and his parents. But when years passed when he is getting older, he slowly starts to realize what kind of broken world he is living in.

Now for those who played the HD Universe of the GTA Games you know every protagonist in the HD universe like Niko, Johnny, Luis, Michael Franklin, and Trevor. As much as they have different stories and perspectives but this story about GTA OC that he was living with full of offensiveness, disrespectfulness, brutal honesty, and others. An example in GTA IV a radio commercial of Babies Overnight that said that someone was not satisfied with the baby it can be disposed of. Although it would be interesting to have that backstory for my next OC for GTA. So, this story may contain a lot of murder and crimes on what led to him going to San Andreas. So, watch out. And for those who have not played GTA Online why his parents are both Claude and Misty is because it was part of the premium edition for free in Epic Games.

Def Jam X Kung Fu Panda: Book 1 Fight for A New Fight (maybe a working title) - After the events of Def Jam Vendetta, Fight For New York, and The Kung Fu Panda Trilogy including Legends of Awesomeness. Set during Paws of Destiny Season 2 in the Kung Fu Panda universe while in Def Jam 2 years later in the year 2005 after Crow's death (Fight for NY still takes place in 2003) Kervin (Def Jam Fight For NY) the new leader D-Mob's crew but also officially known as the Def Jam Crew after Blaze appointed him to take his place. Kervin has to manage every venue, club, and arenas in New York including places that Crow took over. But in Chinese New Year there was something strange that Kervin and his crew got transported to a different universe. Including former members, fighters, and circuit fighters.

Now, this fanfiction sounded really odd. As you may know why I am making crossover fanfic of Kung Fu Panda X Def Jam? Easy. The first one is because this is what would have been my PS2 games if I ever have a PS2. I was thinking of Mortal Kombat or Yakuza for Def Jam but Kung Fu Panda is the only thing I know when I was 7 years old. The second is because back in the days Hip Hop mixed with Kung Fu was very popular. Although Def jam may be a wrestling game martial arts stole my heart in Def Jam Fight For NY. I heard about things like the Wu-Tang Clan for example but the biggest problem for me is that I am not a true fan of Def Jam because I don’t know about hip hop artists. Just only the games so I will be focusing on their video game counterparts in their fictitious manner meaning pretending real-life characters with their real name are fictional characters. So, if there and fun facts in those real-life counterparts I may add them to it like easter eggs. The third is that there are Kung Fu Panda characters that did not get enough love and mostly art. So many recognizable characters like Po, Tigress, Tai Lung, and many more have become the most recognizable characters in the movies. But what about the tv shows like Legends of Awesomeness and Paws of Destiny? One of my favorite characters of Legends of Awesomeness is Peng, in short, he is the nephew of Tai Lung and he is such an interesting character that he deserves a lot more love. While for Paws of Destiny is Xiao because she is such a cute character, so is her personality and the best character to have hugs with. So, what I am trying to say is that I need to start off with the character that is unrecognizable then bring it recognizably. I may also add characters from shorts like student Mei Ling in the future book and it would be funny and to see rogue Mei Ling. 2 Mei Lings in one. Even Su and Master Snow Leopard because are both female leopards with the same appearance and outfit. I may also include some characters from the flash game Tales of Po and may possibly rewrite them in different stories because I love the character designs thanks to Blue Maxima’s FlashPoint. And the fourth and final part is that to make the Def jam games more recognizable. Def Jam in music is not absolutely enough but video games are. The Def Jam games did not bring a sequel after Fight For NY so I might as well make a sequel with interesting and experimental crossover fanfic just like The Loonatics Road.

The Red Fox (Kingdom Force Spinoff and maybe a working title) - The Kingdom Force has 5 members defending the 5 Kingdoms. Luka the wolf who leads in red, Jabari who runs in yellow, TJ who drills in green, Delilah who swings in orange, and Norvyn who strengthens in blue. Each of the 5 drives Kingdom Riders and turns them into Alpha Mech to fight against evil in the 5 Kingdoms. But even if they save the day multiple times the 5 Kingdoms are still filled with more crime and every antagonist came back doing other crimes and evil deeds because they were not arrested or eliminated. That's is when a red fox came along...

I have seen popular fandoms in cartoons that were supposed to aim at younger kids like Lion Guard, MLP, Paw Patrol, and even Bluey. But Kingdom Force is the cartoon that did get enough love. It's like Power Rangers and Voltron but with anthropomorphic animals like Zootopia. However, the stories and episodes in the show is very confusing and give me almost a lot of questions. But I do like the character designs in the show. My favorite hero is Luka who is a leader with and cute cuddly character personality and my favorite villain Envie Fernadez which she has a pretty hot design, name and voice and so is her personality. Reminds me of Sly Cooper but I have not played the game yet. But for the red fox also OC Kervin (Kindom Force) It’s still at work.

APB Reloaded X Zootopia: Anyone Can Be All You Can’t Be: - In Zootopia “Anyone Can Be Anything” But in San Paro “Be All You Can’t Be” Zootopia is a place where vicious predators and meek prey live in harmony. This means that people in Zootopia live together without the prey getting eaten by predators and predators not getting feared by the prey. They almost eat like us, they sleep like us, they speak like us, they walk like us, they run like us, they bathe like us (well almost), and most importantly they use technology like us. While San Paro maybe has a good look to sightsee but this city has a lot of crime. Robberies, bombings, thefts, drug dealing, murders and causalities, vandalism, and much more that we can think of. But that does not mean there is no justice in this world. When the Criminals like the Blood Roses and the G-Kings try to take over San Paro? The Enforcers Prentiss Tigers and Praetorians from come and save the day. What would happen when a human Enforcer meets a police fox and a police bunny? And how did it happen? Only one way to find out.

Now this one is also a Kervinverse crossover story. It focuses on Kervin (APB Reloaded) meeting Judy and Nick. I am trying to find a way on how will they meet each other. But the only thing ideas I know is that it can be a delivery gone wrong, an invention gone haywire or maybe a criminal stole something magical that is transported to a different universe. But I have a lot of strange things in the game like the Christmas events and Halloween events. I like to see any volunteers who play APB Reloaded. And for those Zootopia fans who have not played APB Reloaded you check it here. https://store.steampowered.com/app/113400/APB_Reloaded/

Well, that is it for the Kervinverse stories. Now it’s time for the other stories that I also planned in the future.

OTHER FANFICS:

Alza Flare (Road Rovers Fan Spinoff)- Alza is a black cat born in the place in New York City, USA. He was born inside a pet shop without cat parents since he was born. His parents' status is unknown. Although he did make friends with other cats and non-cats in the shop. But it was a short while until a human customer named Drayson Flare and adopted him as Alza Flare. Alza has been Drayson's pet for 3 years and they instantly became best friends but when during the time when they are about to go home from the park. A terrible accident happened.

A long time ago I watched Road Rovers on my phone just to try something nostalgic and the show is pretty good though although there are some parts that don’t use their powers all the time. One part that caught my eye is how brutal car accident in the episode “Dawn of The Groomer” which gave me an idea of my new anti-villain OC character named Alza Flare. Sadly, he does have an image of him yet. But I will tell you that I will give you an interesting revenge story for him.

The Best Surfer In The World (Surf’s Up Spinoff. Maybe a working a title and synopsis change) - After the events of Surf's Up and Surf's Up 2: Wavemania. There was once a wolf who lives in the place of Chicago Illinois. He quit his own career due to being a rejected member of Hang 5 for being too unstable and after beating J.C. in a tournament years ago and after his early retirement, he spends his normal life as an ice cream man in his own ice-cream motorcycle with one of his own freshest ingredients and swears to himself that he would never in the waters again. Until he met a young Toyger.

Surf’s Up is my first favorite mockumentaries since I was young. It’s like you are watching animals andromorphic animals absolutely existed in the world we live in. It had an interesting story and writing so are the interesting characters. But when I watched Surf’s Up Wavemania. Well, I honestly love the WWE Superstars and Diva came into the movie but the story did not actually surprise me a lot. Even if the movie has a lot of beautiful locations it still did not surprise me enough because it is more like an adventure than a tournament. That is why I am planning to start my fanfiction in a new different approach with a real story and a real rivalry. Starting with wolf inspired and based on CM Punk during the part when he won the WWE belt against Cena in Money in the Bank when I watched it since intermediate school with a little rename change so it won’t be obvious. And of course, my Toyger OC because he would be trained by his own surfing master. Also, I added a Slam City easter egg

Fire Pro Wrestling World Origins: Story of 2 Angels – There is no synopsis of them yet. But I will tell you they are brother and sister with the last name “Angel” The brother who is a pop artist while the sister who joined a motorcycle club. What they both have in common is they both can fight. Their stories about my 2 new Fire Pro OCs will be coming soon. But they are not part of the fighting roads.

Well, that is all for all the future stories with some summaries that I really want to share coming soon. Thanks for following including Wattpad

For those who are new here follow me on both Tumblr and Wattpad with the orange word link

Feel free to donate to me in PayPal

Also making fanfic is really long to make just like making an announcement. So again. I only post all chapters in 1 book.

[popculturebuffet]

Loud House Reviews: The Loudest Thanksgiving

It’s almost Thanksgiving! And a vastly diffrent one than in recent memory: Most of us are slimming down family gatherings to just whose in our house, you know because theirs a pandemic going on and it’s not worth risking your life for it. To those either guilting their families into it or doing so because MAGa or some such I only have this to say. 

Speaking of Black Friday i’ts spread over a week and it’s cyber deals mean I got a ton of graphic novels for a dollar a piece and my christmas shopping almost done. So in other words, boo Maga, yay safe and responsible captalisim.  But while the holiday may be diffrent, as well as the pseudo holiday attached that spawned a wonderful musical and many many injuries, one thing stays the same; Holiday Episodes. And despite being the less popular of the three holidays, Thanksgiving still produced tons of great holiday episodes and specials. And with everything being so busy I simply didn’t put too much thought into what to do for Turkey Day.. well okay the day proper i’m going to eat, spend time with family and watch a bunch of mystery science theater 3000, stay the course even in these troubling times, just with only the 4 other people who live in my house. But in terms of episodes I thought i had nothing.. then I started actually thinking on it and what do you know I have three things I want to do for the holiday, though one might wait till next year, and possibly a fourth. But given my workload currently, i’m not one to back away from a challenge, so welcome to a three or four course meal of reviews. First course: The Loud House thanksgiving special, the loudest thanksgiving.  I originally wasn’t going to do this one, mostly because due to my large workload and constant battle with procastination, I keep having to push back the latest episode review, and I have to do that one soon, as there’s a new episode in december and a christmas episode i’ve put off watching for far too long , as I INTENDED to watch eleven louds a leapin for every chirstmas up till now and never got to it before the season was over.  But just like elven louds.. Nick forced my hand.. and by that I mean the SPINOFF got a thanksgiving episode that’s also a sequel in some fashion to this episode. If I wanted to cover that episode this thanksgiving or the next I had to at least watch the original. And frankly, this close to the holiday there was no reason not to review it. So with that out of the way. 

Let’s Get At Er. This is The Loudest Thanksgiving... after the break

The Loudest Thanksgiving takes place during season 3, and still pre-casagrandes spinoff launch despite the christmas special taking place earlier. This is actually easy to explain: The Loud House runs on Comic Strip time... i.e. the characters don’t age unless the writers decide they do. But while the spinoff was in motion at this point, it was still a season off airing wise, and ill advised raitings stunt mini series wise, so in order to keep the Casagrandes fresh in people’s minds presumably, they did a crossover that at this point wasn’t a crossover but now technically is because the show exists but this existed before the show. 

It’s just a show, and I should really just relax. Point is this is a pre-crossover crossover, the two families meet for the first time, the man already said pitter patter, let’s get back at er.  So we open with Flip serving as our magical snowman narrator and regaling us with the tale of steven. Every compastionate can you imagine it... and i’m fucking with you, it’s of course abotu that time the louds and the casagrandes tried having thanksgiving together. 

We then cut to Lori and Bobby being all cute, as usual, and both talking over the phone as each show off their thanksgivings to each other and the enusing family shenanigans. On Lori’s side Lynn is wearing baggy pants so she dosen’t miss the game or the meal by going to the bathroom.. because that’s how pissing yourself works. Look if your going to do something that gross, stupid and broish just woman up and wear an adult diaper. The twins are guarding Lynn sr and the food, poorly, and Lisa has invented a Gravy Squriting robot. I can only see this ending one way. 

Yeah those single function robots really get useless once the exestnetial crisis kicks in. 

On the casagrandes side, Rosa is likewise guarding her kitchen, Frida is painting and Hector plans to sernade eveyrone because Hector is the best and you all should know that. Even with the recent Bobby Abuse he’s still awesome. As for the Mercado, CJ and Ronnie Anne are running the annual canned food drive because CJ is better than the best and should really be used more often.  Both wish they could be there.. and both honestly talk about possibly spending thanksgiving with each other and just one of their family. It’s not a wild proposition: Both are going to college soon, both are in a longterm relationship.. they plan to get married down the line for now. If things hold they will eventually have to figure this out. Of course rather than fate let them figure this out themselves, Hector overhears on Bobby’s end and Lincoln, whose busy A Clock Work Oranging himself so he can stay awake during dinner, overhears on Loris, leading to an emergency family meeting for both sides.  Both families are worried their prospective teenager going to another house of their longterm significant other for one year will mean they get all the holidays. Having never had a relationship last long enough to worry about this, I don’t quite get it as in my experince watching couples juggle this.. they usually just alternate years, spoilers the solution the episode goes with, or trade off christmas and thanksgiving, both fair solutions. Buuut as much as this bothered me at first the more I thought about it the more it actually made sense: People.. aren’t always rational and won’t always do the smart or correct thing, especially when it comes to their children. And with Lori leaving college and the casagrandes being togehter for thanksgiving for the first time in about 5 years, with both ronnie anne and her mom not having had a proper one in some time due to her mom needing to work thanksgiving, presumibly because of the eternal curse of gravy chugging contests, they have valid emotional reasons to go a bit nuts and do some irrational and assholish things. They just don’t want to loose their big sister and big brother, and that’s fair. It may not be at all accurate but it’s fair. 

So thus began the great Guilt Off of 2018. ON the Loud side they START with a fairly soft pitch, the twins simply offer her food early, and she takes it because honestly I would too. Then again, i’d also take free food in just about any situation, so i’m not really a good gage for this. As long as it’s not poision i’ll probably eat it if it’s free. The next two are a little.. less subtle, with the kids talking about Lori’s roll in the annual thanksgiving skit.. which I’m assuming is soley for Lynn Sr. as no one else seems to be going to their thanksgiving. Which granted theirs valid explinations for why their neighbors didn’t go, the mcbrides and mr grouse have their own families and while Mr Grouse rarely gets to see his, he now has neighborly friends after the last holiday special happy to help. But Pop Pop.. makes no sense as his girlfriend, the only plausable reason he wouldn’t be there, was said to not have much family in her debut. So he’s just.. absent from thanksgiving for no reason. Thena gain we later find out this play is movie length, so maybe he was just trying to escape that which in that case, who can blame him. Rita almost reigns things back in with the mother’s trump card: parental guilt. Almost. She then almost crushes lori’s hand but it’s funny enough.  At the Casagrandes, their opening move is largely the same only Rosa wins in terms of execution, cooking up some of bobby’s faviorites to specificially target him. Frida paints him into a painting, again the Casagrandes win his one in terms of effort. They do tie in the last bit, as Maria and Ronnie Anne try the same sort of guilt slining with the same bone crushing.  Eventually both teens get fed up with the next bit; For Lori, Lucy gives her a long overdramatic poem about an empty chair which is easily tied with one bit later for best bit of hte episode.. which granted when I can only think of two or three gags that really made me laugh...

Bobby likewise gets Hector telling the story about a realitvie not going to thanksgiving. Both get angry.. which for Lori, isn’t all that suprising, if entirely warranted. For Bobby though? It’s like pissing off a dolphin. IT’s hard to do and very much not something you want to actually pull of. Both families are forced to admit they eavesdropped, and are incredibly worried about this whole situation, with Lynn Sr selling lincoln up the river for telling them... this man’s capacity for selling out his children is as awe insprising as it is truly pathetic. 

So the two teens go back to their rooms to figure something out and come upon a reasonable solution: just have one of the families host and both come to it. That’s more than fair. But given we still have a full special to pad out, both families are still treating this like a competion: while the louds win the coin toss, both sides are determined to win thanksgiving. IT’s far from the most insane contest i’ve seen this month, x of swords was happening and i’ve seen a russian yank a goblin out of the demonic alligator skin he was using as a puppet. And we don’t know for sure Arrakoa and Krakoa didn’t have a trial over a baby turkey being adorable as one of the challenges. Other challenges included getting drunk, an eating contest, telling someone to murder a kitten and a wedding, all of this is actual stuff that happened in this recent crossover, I have made up nothing. 

So after the break and Flip realizing oh shit the audience is back, the war begins. The Louds are preparing for war, with Lola putting out a picture of herself instead of bobby and laurie because of course.. still not a half bad gag. The Casagrandes arrive and in in a passive agressive move that was already done a year before this special by Brooklyn Nine Nine and better, brought their own food.. though the roast pig is a nice and unique touch. Points for that.  And this.. is where the special gets tedious. Yeah while the IDEA of this episode was really good and I was excited to cover it in practice it’s just similar gags on both sides done for both halves: The first being “let’s guilt them into staying” and the second being “Let’s one up each other” with only two bits really working: Frieda having a painting and the louds annual skit.  And the skit is because it raises a LOT of questions: Why is it 90 minutes, who played the adorable turkey in the years between babies? Was it just whoever was youngest? Who wrote this? Who is this for besides Lynn Sr and Pop Pop? Who all has sat through this thing at some point? Is that why the mcbrides don’t come over for thanksgiving? It’s just.. fantastic is what i’m saying.  

But otherwise this part is just the family trying to one up each other with food, or toasts, or song, before devolving into a big fight. What makes it not work is.. there isn’t a lot of personality there. You have these two big, plentiful, intresting casts, even at this stage with the Casagrandes far less established and fleshed out. And instead of finding interesting ways for them to play off one another meeting for the first time, and to use that to also flesh the characters out more for the inevitable spinoff, it’s just 

For most of the second half. Thankfully it DOES manage to bring things around as after things degenerate into a food fight, the families decide to just ASK the two of them where they want to go.. and find them entirely missing.  It then turns out, in a nice twist, this is where Flip came in. Since his place is the only place open 24/7 and 365, barring fishing season, Bobby and Lori fled here to flee their insane families.. who then follow them there because Carlos and Lisa have them chipped. I was suprised at first Carlos had a tracker on bobby but honestly, i’ts just common sense. The man is like a golden retriver in a man’s body. Here’s an artists interpretation

Both families breifly bicker before Lori and Bobby announce their starting their own family thankgiving with blackjack, and hookers. They really shouldn’t of let Flip in on the brainstorming session. Both families don’t want that, and apologize, admitting they just didn’t want to loose them and both genuinely offering to let the other have them next year. Flip, who despite having a “pay for my colonoscopy jar” with a picture of his ass on it, is somehow the voice of reason and just suggests trading thanksgivings every year, everyone accepts, and we do get a genuinely heartwarming ending of both sides gathering everything for a gas station thanksgiving. Honestly reminds me of king of the hill’s airport episode, but in a very good way and still unique enough circumstances to work.Also Flip, of all people, donates the cans needed to finish the can drive.. granted i’m not sure if they WANT any of that meat, but hey, he meant well and it made me really like the character.  We get a heartwearming duet between hector and luna and sono the whole family and we’re out. 

Final Thoughts: This was disapointing. I’ve listed most of my complaints already, but overall it wasted a good premise of two families coming together, and even the feud parts could’ve been funnier. As it is it’s just.. ehhhhhhhhhh. It has some good parts, and bobby is an angel here on earth as always. But the whole just feels padded. Like this was SUPPOSED to just be 11 minutes, got bumped up, and thus here we are. It’s not the worst Loud House has done, i’ve seen and heard of muccch worse, but for a holiday special it just feels stale and i’ve seen way better thanksgiving specials. And i’ll be getting to that.  If there’s an episode of a cartoon you’d like me to cover, just pop in my ask box or dms and you can comission a review for 5 bucks a piece. Discounts on bulk, 15 for movies. Until then , happy thanksgiving.

[onestarromcoms]

December 3: “The Spirit of Christmas”(Hulu)

FYI: This is not a good movie. It does, however, feature what comes pretty close to a Hallmark/ X-Files crossover, as it features hauntings and time travel. This movie gets props for featuring a non-traditional romance between a corporeal leading lady and a handsome ghost-man. The mythology in this movie is absurd and the acting is terrible, but I’m a sucker for a man with a quiff and a waistcoat, so I’ve actually voluntarily watched this three times.

Our story opens on leading lady Kate, our predictable “workaholic lawyer,” getting dumped by her current boyfriend because she isn’t emotionally available enough. She immediately goes back to work managing the estate of someone who is recently deceased. Twelve days before Christmas, her boss sends her to a beautiful historic inn to get it appraised so they can sell it. Except when she gets to the Inn and tries to talk to the current caretaker, it turns out she can’t sell the place because - surprise! - IT’S HAUNTED!!! And the ghost is FINE. This movie also features such zingers as:

Ghost-man’s name is Daniel, who, judging by his golden pocket watch and the way he eats an apple by cutting it with a pocketknife, died sometime in the 1920s. Yeah, he eats food, and he’s solid (otherwise he wouldn’t be able to make out with Kate later). But he can turn invisible and walk through walls at will. He’s haunted the Inn since he died, but in a weird Christmas-y twist, only for the twelve days leading up to Christmas. Once Kate overcomes the shock of ghosts being real, and Daniel being a hot ghost, their story then becomes about trying to “free” Daniel from the “curse” of being semi-corporeal once a year. The movie skirts the X-Files line until halfway through the mystery when the local pub’s plumbing bursts! and Kate and Daniel have to Save Christmas for the Locals! by hosting a Christmas party at the Inn. Turns out, Daniel is a damn fine bartender. They share their first kiss at this party, which complicates things, because isn’t Daniel supposed to be trying to get into the Great Beyond?

The ghost mythology in this movie doesn’t make any sense and frankly even after three viewings I have a hard time articulating it, but basically, Daniel is haunting the Inn because he was murdered and has unfinished business re: his dead fiance Lilly and his brother Oliver, as he caught the two of them making out in the moments before he died. He also has some brand-new flashbacks that lead him to believe Lilly was pregnant with Oliver’s kid - but it might be Daniel’s kid? - but I’m not really sure because that “evidence” isn’t really explained, and the baby died in infancy, so frankly there’s no reason to include it except to generate sympathy for Daniel. Maybe a fourth viewing will clear it up. In the weirdest turn of events in this movie, there are actually several ghosts in this movie. Daniel has never remembered them before, but Kate’s constant interrogation acts like regression therapy for him, and he starts piecing together memories of the days leading up to his death. In the final act we meet the ghosts of Oliver, who has a fight with Daniel about his rum-running job; Daniel’s gangster boss, who murdered him; and Lilly, who did cheat on Daniel, but who also still loves Daniel.

At the climax of the movie, Daniel and Kate believe they’ve broken the curse by discovering Daniel’s murderer, and Kate is full-on prepared to commit to a monogamous relationship with a ghost-man she can only see for twelve days a year. (Sounds perfect, am I right, ladies?!?!) Daniel wooshes away at the strike of midnight and we see him being led away by Lilly’s ghost, who is promising that his wait in purgatory is over. In the end, Daniel decides he’d rather stay corporeal and date Kate than enter the Great Beyond with Lilly. The movie ends leaving me with far more questions than answers: is Daniel a normal human now? Because he broke the curse? Even though he was dead and a ghost before? Did he travel through time? Or was he re-assembled somehow? We may never know.

SPOLIERS: They kiss, declare their love for each other, and start dating (no weddings here). This movie is terrible, but I love it, and I will probably watch it every year for the rest of my life.

[imagitory]

D-Views: The Princess and the Frog (with guest input!)

Hi everybody! Welcome to another installment of D-Views, my on-going written review series focused around the works of the Walt Disney Company, as well as occasionally films made by other studios that were influenced by Disney’s works! For reviews for Disney films like Mary Poppins, The Little Mermaid, and Treasure Planet or non-Disney films like Anastasia, The Nutcracker Prince, or The Prince of Egypt, please consult my “Disney reviews” tag!

I’m super excited about today’s subject -- not only is its heroine my favorite Disney princess, but I also won’t be watching the movie alone! My darling mum, who has in the past helped me review Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, has graciously agreed to co-review this with me! We hope that you will join us on this magical adventure through the Louisiana bayou as we review...The Princess and the Frog!

In the early 2000′s, the Walt Disney Company -- especially its animation department -- was in trouble. Of all of the films done in the so-called “Experimental Era,” the only animated film that had made Disney a real profit was 2002′s Lilo and Stitch. The others, even if they did manage to receive favorable reviews, were all financial disappointments. The Emperor’s New Groove was fourth at the box office opening weekend behind movies like What Women Want and How the Grinch Stole Christmas and only grossed about 169 million dollars in theaters worldwide after costing 100 million to make. Brother Bear even now boasts a rather sad 37% rating at Rotten Tomatoes. And even if Atlantis: The Lost Empire hadn’t received such lukewarm reviews and been accused of plagiarizing several other movies (most notably Nadia: The Secret of the Blue Water, Stargate, and, as I’ve discussed previously, Castle in the Sky), it wouldn’t have changed the fact that it was released the same year as Dreamworks’ green monster hit Shrek. But no Experimental Era film did as badly as the last one -- Home on the Range -- which after its release in 2004 was so badly received both by critics and at the box office that it prompted Disney to write down the production costs and announce the closing of its 2D animation department for good.

But it didn’t close for good. In 2006, the new president and chief creative officer of the company, Ed Cadmill and John Lasseter, reversed the decision. The 2D animation department had one last chance to turn their dark destiny around, and in 2009, as Disney did after World War II with Cinderella and in the late 80′s with The Little Mermaid, it pinned its hopes on a beautiful, goodhearted princess.

The Princess and the Frog in some ways was Disney’s attempt to return to their Disney Renaissance roots. Its directors -- John Musker and Ron Clements -- had previously directed The Little Mermaid and Aladdin among others. The reinvented fairy tale story features magic, a theatrical villain, a prince, animal sidekicks, romance, and Broadway-musical-style songs. Even the advertising highlighted how much it wanted to remind millennial audiences of the films they grew up with, putting a spotlight on the music and beautiful hand-drawn animation, rather than the “adult,” meta humor that Dreamworks had used to advertise its films and Disney later used to advertise its next Disney princess movie, Tangled. Some production details leaked to the public, such as the title of “The Frog Princess,” the main character’s original name, and her profession as a chambermaid, also were edited upon receiving backlash, and still others (such as the use of voodoo in the plot and our black princess’s prince not being black) were just left as is. Despite all of the negative press that swirled around the project, there was also a lot of promise that Disney fans noted too, such as Dreamgirls supporting actress Anika Noni Rose being cast as Tiana, Pixar composer Randy Newman being chosen to write the film’s score and songs, and Oprah Winfrey being brought on both as a technical consultant and the voice of Tiana’s mother Eudora.

The marketing decision to focus more on nostalgic millennial adults rather than the new Generation Z is what I feel largely contributed to The Princess and the Frog not being the blockbuster Disney was hoping for. As much as I wholeheartedly believe that animation is not and has never been a children’s medium, the attitude that lingered around the public consciousness in the late 2000′s and sadly even today is that animation -- most importantly, 2D animation -- is for kids, and without the kids being just as excited to watch the film as their nostalgic parents, uncles, aunts, and older siblings, The Princess and the Frog was fighting an uphill battle, even if it was produced by a marketing monster like Disney. Even though the movie was handicapped by this bad marketing choice, however, I would still argue that The Princess and the Frog was a success. Even with that bad marketing choice, the racism-themed controversies that had swirled around its production, and the release of James Cameron’s blockbuster Avatar a week later weighing it down, Tiana costumes were selling out everywhere prior to Halloween that year. The movie still was #1 at the box office opening weekend, an honor not held by a Disney animated movie since Lilo and Stitch. It still made $104.4 million and was the fifth highest grossing film that year. It still earned pretty favorable reviews, earning an 85% at Rotten Tomatoes.

Sadly, because The Princess and the Frog wasn’t the big blockbuster that The Little Mermaid had been, Disney turned its focus more toward its 3D projects, and after the release of Winnie the Pooh in 2011 (the same weekend as Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2 -- COME ON, DISNEY, WERE YOU EVEN TRYING TO GIVE THIS FILM A CHANCE??), the 2D department did close its doors after all, and the studio went in a new direction with the release of Tangled. It’s a choice I lament Disney making, for as much as I’ve enjoyed most of the 3D entries to the Disney Revival, there was something so utterly magical about seeing The Princess and the Frog’s premiere at Walt Disney Studios in Burbank with my mother back in 2009. 2D animation is a beautiful art form, and it’s frustrating that Disney has turned its back on it so thoroughly after it got Disney to where it is now. The Princess and the Frog could’ve been the Great Mouse Detective to another 2D film that could’ve been a Little Mermaid and proved once again that 2D animation is for everyone, not just for kids, just as Little Mermaid did. But instead, the film that was the Revival version of The Little Mermaid was Disney’s first 3D princess film, Tangled -- and not to diss Tangled as a film, but it saddens me that it succeeded largely by playing to the public’s ignorant attitude that 3D animation is more “adult” than 2D animation and that the way to communicate that your animated movie is “for adults too” in your trailers is through using snarky meta humor rather than through artistry and complex themes.

With all this background out of the way...laissez le beau temps rouler! Let’s start the film!

Anika’s singing voice starting our film out is just a perfect introduction. Its pure, unassuming tone just ripples with sincerity as we are led into our introductory scene for our main character Tiana, her mother Eudora, and her absolutely hysterical best friend, Charlotte “Lottie” La Bouff. As we leave the La Bouff manor, we also see a touch of the “Lady and the Tramp influence” that Musker and Clements added to the production in the background design. Just by transitioning from the well-kept, affluent neighborhood in the dimming sunlight to the more run-down areas of town at night, we get a perfect, complete sense of the environment that our heroine lives in, all without any dialogue. And yet, as Mum pointed out, even the rundown areas are full of warmth and charm. Just like in Lady and the Tramp, they never look scary or shady, simply modest and maybe a little worn. On the note of charm, as well, I absolutely friggin’ adore Tiana’s dad, James. Considering how big of a role he has in the story, it’s really good that we see how big of an impact he had on his daughter through his good, hard-working attitude and love for his family and neighborhood despite not having much screen-time.

Once the “Walt Disney Pictures” banner floats by, we finally meet Tiana as an adult. As mentioned earlier, Tiana is my favorite Disney princess. Part of the reason why comes back to the fact that Tiana’s movie came out right before I started my first job (ironically enough at a restaurant in Disney World) and she inspired me to give 120% everyday, but the other reason Tiana speaks to me so much is because she reminds me quite a bit of Mum! Like my mother, Tiana is a very warmhearted, logical, and hardworking person who never sits on her laurels and is always ready to fix a problem, and it was really cool to see a Disney princess with the same kind of organized mind and stubborn work ethic that I saw in my mum growing up. That feeling I had watching Tiana’s story is one of the things that inspired me to write my Disney crossover story TrueMagic, where I wrote a character directly inspired by Mum. On top of all that, I realize that Tiana speaks a lot of the millennial and gen Z experience, having to save up a lot of money at two dead-end minimum wage jobs just to try to get ahead in a world where the cards are stacked against her. We even see her sleeping in the room she grew up in, meaning she’s still living at home as an adult to make ends meet!! Isn’t that relatable!!

I have heard others critique Randy Newman’s music, but in my opinion the score and songs developed for this movie perfectly set the mood of 1920′s New Orleans. The opening number “Down in New Orleans” is really well-paced with the medley of scenes introducing Tiana’s usual work day, Dr. Facilier’s vindictiveness and desire for Eli La Bouff’s wealth, Naveen’s playboy attitude, and Charlotte’s instant attraction to the newly arrived Prince. Of the songs, I’d personally cite Tiana’s “Almost There” and Facilier’s “Friends on the Other Side” as the strongest links, with “Gonna Take You There” as the weakest, but even if you don’t end up finding the songs catchy, I don’t think anyone can deny how well it suits the film’s setting.

Now admittedly, one critique you could give the film is its idealized, whitewashed view of historical race relations. Let’s be honest: in the 1920′s, a rich cotton baron like Eli La Bouff would not have visited a cafe on Tiana’s side of town and he would not let his precious daughter engage with Tiana as an adult either. As much as there were people who didn’t follow the common attitude that black Americans were somehow “inferior” to white Americans, if you didn’t follow that attitude, you couldn’t have expected to be very financially successful or influential in such a racist society, as Mr. La Bouff is. On top of that, Tiana would not only be facing passive prejudice when trying to open her own restaurant, like the kind the Fenner brothers express about her “background” -- she would also be likely facing active discrimination and potentially violence. As much as this film doesn’t truly represent the way things were back then, however, I would argue that the decision in the end benefits the picture, which clearly is supposed to be a fairy tale. This is a story where a girl kisses a frog, becomes one herself, meets an alligator who plays the blues and a firefly in love with a star, and both fights against and alongside people who practice voodoo. It may have a historical backdrop, kind of like Pocahontas and The Great Mouse Detective do, but it is still a fantasy. There are other films that aim to teach us about how things really were back then, so why can’t we have one where a young black American lives her own fairy tale in the iconic Crescent City? Plus, in Mum’s words, an integral part of this story is the pure, unlikely friendship between Charlotte and Tiana, which would have been close to impossible in a completely historical setting. To my memory, it’s actually one of the few times we see a close friendship between two female contemporaries in a Disney princess movie -- the closest we’d had previously were relationships like Aurora with the three fairies (which was more of a familial relationship) and Belle and Mrs. Potts (which...yeah, big generation gap). Even in films that came later, we have Elsa and Anna, but they’re sisters, not just friends. And Tiana having a friend like Charlotte ends up being pivotal in her eventual triumph.

Speaking of Charlotte and her friendship with Tiana, something I love about her is that she doesn’t just give Tiana the money she needs to open her own restaurant. Instead, because she knows Tiana has pride and wouldn’t just accept the money for nothing, Charlotte finds a reason for her to give her the money she needs by assigning her the task of making beignets for the ball she and her father are hosting. It’s something that reminds me a bit of my mum and her best friend, who also comes from a wealthy family -- like Charlotte, my mum’s best friend likes spending money on my mum, but has always known that she can’t buy my mum’s friendship. Both she and Charlotte know that you can only be a friend through expressing sincere caring, which is the mark of a true friend.

Ever since The Princess and the Frog first came out, “Almost There” has been my work mantra, and every time I hear it, I just am full of drive and excitement. The animation for this sequence -- animated by senior Disney icon Eric Goldberg, who previously worked on the Rhapsody in Blue segment in Fantasia 2000 and was the supervising animator for the Genie in Aladdin -- is also pitch perfect, incorporating both Al Hiershfeld-inspired designs and an Art Deco vibe to envelope us in Tiana’s fantasy. It’s one of the kind of artistic risks that Disney used to do more often, like the Pink Elephants sequence in Dumbo, the fairy’s gift sequences in Sleeping Beauty, and the Zero to Hero sequence in Hercules, and you just don’t see this sort of highly stylized song sequence in most of Disney’s newer films. The only one that comes to mind is the “You’re Welcome” sequence in Moana, which ironically enough also featured Eric Goldberg drawing all of Maui’s “Mini-Maui” tattoos! Those sorts of stylized musical numbers is something I’d love to see more of in the Disney Revival, because it gives the film in question such character and can bring an already great song to new heights.

Naveen is a character who I could’ve very easily disliked upon first meeting him. Obnoxious, selfish, and/or vain characters -- such as Lightning McQueen from Cars or even Kuzco from The Emperor’s New Groove -- really tend to rub me the wrong way, unless there is something in the character at the very beginning that makes me want to see them improve themselves. Fortunately our main prince is saved for me because we see that along with his vain, shallow, playboy attitude, he also expresses a great love of music and living life to the fullest. He doesn’t ignore his responsibilities as a prince just to be rebellious or lazy, but because he is so in love with New Orleans and its culture. He isn’t an angry or willfully condescending person: he immediately starts dancing with regular New Orleans citizens and is enthralled with the moves of a tiny street entertainer. And just as Tiana represents the millennial experience through working multiple jobs just to make ends meet, Naveen expresses a different kind of millennial experience -- that of being so sheltered by one’s privilege that, once you’re on your own, you’re incapable of sustaining the life style you’ve become accustomed to and are led by society to believe you should be able to achieve. At this point, it’s still easy to feel sorry for Lawrence, Naveen’s resident “Peter Pettigrew-look-alike” manservant, though that impulse quickly disappears after we see his interactions with our villain, Dr. Facilier. Speaking of which...

Just as Tiana is my favorite Disney princess, Dr. Facilier is my favorite Disney villain. Voiced by Keith David, the man who previously gave life to Goliath in Disney’s Gargoyles, the so-called “Shadowman” is -- in Mum’s words -- just “deliciously evil.” His voice drips with cold charisma, dipping into rich bass tones but never sounding groggy or lacking in energy, and the animation -- done by Bruce W. Smith, supervising animator for Oscar Proud from the Disney Channel show The Proud Family -- just fits David’s line-reads like a glove. Although Lawrence briefly provokes Facilier, effectively foreshadowing his true viciousness, the witch doctor largely puts on a theatrical persona that entices even the most jaded viewers in with his song “Friends on the Other Side.” Mum brought up the wonderful comparison to Oogie Boogie in Tim Burton’s The Nightmare Before Christmas, and just like Oogie Boogie, Facilier’s number feels very unscripted and spontaneous, and yet it’s still conniving. Even though the song is jazzy and oddly conversational, there’s this dangerous, sinister darkness echoing in the background, not just in the echoing voices of the Friends on the Other Side but in the lyrics with multiple meanings (”when I look into your future, it’s the green that I’ve seen”). Along with the theatricality, however, Facilier doesn’t forget to also be very intimidating as a villain -- the scene where he turns Naveen into a frog gets quite scary in its imagery.

Just as everything seems to have come up roses for her, Tiana is suddenly about to lose the restaurant of her dreams for good. But there is still hope -- or, at least...there’s a frog. Or a prince. A frog pri -- you get the point. Interestingly Naveen, while a frog, reminded Mum and me of two very different characters. Mum immediately thought of Aladdin, thanks to his charming, smiling expressions, while I immediately thought of another frog seeking a kiss from a beautiful girl: Jean-Bob from The Swan Princess. I personally think the second of those is a coincidence, given that Jean-Bob and Naveen really don’t have much in common excluding a flamboyant accent, but Aladdin’s influence on Naveen’s character animation is pretty reasonable. After all, Flynn Rider’s design was also influenced by previous Disney princes.

Not having seen this movie in a while, I’d forgotten about the “frog hunters” sequence in the middle of the movie until it came on screen. I know that Tiana and Naveen had to face multiple dangers before they reached Mama Odie, not just for dramatic storytelling but also to help cement their budding relationship...but I’m sorry, the characters of the frog hunters are just...uncomfortable. The stereotypical portrayal just comes across as very mean-spirited, especially when compared to the great respect for New Orleans culture in the rest of the movie. The scene does give Tiana and Naveen good character development, though, so it’s a flaw I can overlook to enjoy the rest of the movie.

Usually I don’t enjoy Disney “sidekick” characters as much as I do more developed main or side characters, but I will grant that as sidekicks go, Louis the alligator and especially Ray the firefly are among the better ones. Louis is kind of there for humor more than to advance the plot at all, which is a shame, but Ray becomes both ridiculously charming and central to the film’s theme of love when we see his romantic side in his song “Ma Belle Evangeline.” This song has special significance to Mum and me, all because of Mum’s little Russian Blue/Short-Hair kitty, Evangeline, or Eva for short. When Eva and her sister Ella (full name Cinderella) were being driven home from the pound, the two cats were absolutely beside themselves, crying and yowling the whole way. The only thing that quieted them was me singing songs to them, including songs based on their names -- Cinderella’s opening theme (”Cinderella, you’re as lovely as your name”) for Ella, and “Ma Belle Evangeline” for Eva. Even now, Eva knows that that song is her song, and she always relaxes whenever she hears it. The song sequence in the film also beautifully reflects Tiana and Naveen’s budding relationship, which has already affected them enough that they are starting to take influence from each other. Tiana has started to open up and have some fun, while Naveen is more able to acknowledge his shortcomings and takes more responsibility. They even see eye to eye enough that they stop Louis from telling Ray that Evangeline is a star, not a firefly. Tiana/Naveen is my Disney OTP mainly because of that influence that they have on each other. Both of them are such beautifully flawed characters, but they both also teach and encourage each other to be better people than they would have been on their own.

Tiana and Naveen learn that if they want to turn human again, they need help from Charlotte, who will be “princess” of the Mardi Gras Parade until midnight that night. Unfortunately, when Tiana finds Charlotte, she finds her about to marry who she thinks is Naveen on a float in the parade. Admittedly I kind of wonder why Tiana didn’t consider that it might not be Naveen, as earlier she saw a human Naveen dancing with Charlotte before meeting frog!Naveen and so should know there’s an imposter, but I suppose it’s just story convention, to have this kind of a pre-climax misunderstanding. It’s the same reason why Naveen is locked in a box on the float where he can interrupt the wedding, rather than being stowed away more securely somewhere else, or why Charlotte didn’t turn into a frog too after not being able to turn Tiana and Naveen back.

At long last, our climax arrives. After Dr. Facilier “lays Ray low” in a scene that makes both Mum and me cry out in grief, he corners Tiana in the graveyard, enticing her with the dream she’s worked so hard for in the hopes of getting the medallion that would allow Lawrence to impersonate Naveen and Facilier to steal the La Bouff fortune. But because of all of the character development Tiana’s gone through, she remembers what’s really important -- the people she loves -- and she outdoes the Shadowman, condemning him to be yanked down into the underworld by his so-called “Friends” for all time. The growth Tia’s gone through also gives her the strength and courage needed to put her dream aside and tell Naveen about her feelings for him. And because she’s a true friend, Charlotte shows no hint of bitterness about missing out on her “happily ever after” with Naveen -- instead she immediately is supportive of her friend and tries to fight for her happiness, to the extent that she looks over the moon when Tiana and Naveen get married as humans. Even Ray, who Mum wishes desperately had been able to make it, achieves happiness by finally becoming a star beside his beloved Evangeline. As our film comes to an end with a reprise of “Down in New Orleans,” we’re left with a sense of triumph and optimism...two things that embody our newly crowned princess beautifully.

The Princess and the Frog is a movie that, in Mum’s and my opinion, should receive much more appreciation that it has. Financially speaking, it only did about as well as The Great Mouse Detective and Lilo and Stitch in theaters, but it still has left a lasting impact. I still see plenty of little girls dressing as Tiana in the parks, and I still hear about young black women and girls who have found validation and comfort in the first African American Disney princess. Even I, who share a complexion with white bread, find Tiana an engaging, brilliant role model in today’s world -- in Mum’s words, she embraces the idea of success being half inspiration and half perspiration, but she also learns the virtue in disregarding the chase for success when it comes at the cost of your values. She learns how to love, how to grow, and how to change, while also encouraging the best from those around her. The Princess and the Frog also features what I would argue is the best Disney animated villain since the Disney Renaissance, a soundtrack that embraces its setting to the Nth degree, and a prince who grows just as much as his love interest does while they are together. It’s not a perfect film, but no film is, and Mum and I hope that like other Disney films that didn’t make much money on their initial theatrical releases, we as a Disney fanbase can make this movie a cult classic and give it the love it fought so hard to earn and so rightfully deserves. Look how it lights up the screen -- ma belle Princess and the Frog!

[nightwingism]

The Devil of Blüdhaven

So, I’ve had this thought for a while, couple years actually, and it’s always been something that’s been in the back of my head. I don’t think I’ve seen anyone talk about it, either in the past or now. So, I thought it was about time that I sat down and typed it all out. Air it out. See if I would be crucified at the stake or possibly have people agree with me.

With comic book stuff, it always seems like it’s the extreme of the two options.

Heck, maybe people will see it and point other things out too.

It’s a long one, so I hope y’all don’t mind.

Nightwing, more specifically Dick Grayson, is one of my favorite characters in all of comic book history. Rather, I should say IS my favorite. I own every solo title issue that has been printed. Some of them I have multiple copies of. I currently have a large word document on my computer for my ideal and planned “Volume 5” of Nightwing, where I elevate him to become the Fourth Pillar of the DC Universe. Full of characters, stories, and re-introductions.

But with that being said, I am definitely no expert on the character. I often read other’s opinions and thoughts on him and find new and interesting facets of the character that I never even considered. It’s always a great day when I get to read a long ass essay on why Dick does something or why he is portrayed a certain way or even why he shouldn’t be portrayed in another way.

For the most part, people gravitate towards the same general literation of the character for his characterization. The highly praised Chuck Dixon run on Nightwing, from 1996 to 2002, issue #1 thru #70. I’ll be honest and state that his run was not my introduction to the character, nor even the first comic I bought involving the character. That honor would belong to Batman TAS and the New 52 Nightwing series. Loren Lester is my dude. But that’s a post for another day.

Getting back on track. I’ve reread Dixon’s run so many times, I can basically recite it by memory. This is the run I often cite for people to read, or for a Nightwing Netflix Series or movie. I have much love for it and all that it went out to do to set Nightwing apart from all the other heroes in the DC Universe and I wish that would have stuck around for much longer. Thanks Devin Grayson.

Nightwing is not the only superhero I’m enamored with. Shocking, right? Cyclops, Superman, John Constantine, Spider-Man, Captain America, and literally any hero from Valiant publishing. Love all those characters. They’re amazing. But one hero in particular is one I often circle back to. He goes in the same sphere as Nightwing usually. That is my boy in red, Daredevil.

I’ve been a fan of Daredevil since I saw his episode crossover in Spider-Man TAS. See a trend here? I’ve probably watched that individual episode a couple dozen times. I even own it on DVD. Frank Miller’s Daredevil run is one of my favorite runs, only behind the current one by Chip Zdarsky. His run went through Issues 158 – 191 and 226 – 233.

And while reading through these two actually short runs (70 and 40 issues respectively), I thought of something. I want it to be known that I say this with a lot of love and care for both characters and their stories. And this is where the possibility of me being crucified comes in.

I feel that Chuck Dixon really borrowed a lot from Daredevil, both as a character and in storytelling elements, when crafting his Nightwing run. There are many elements that are eerily comparable to each other, and less so in a normal, comics can only do so much before they start overlapping, kind of way. None of the things that are borrowed are “bad” so to speak for the character, and most of the time, they really just helped Nightwing branch out from Batman and any of the other superheroes in the community. And since a lot of people have clamored to this interpretation, it can be assumed that people responded well to this.

Let’s start with the basics.

Dick Grayson’s mainstay use of escrima sticks started during this run – being the first time they were used and started the trend in issue #1. Religion became an unspoken, but added part to Dick’s life, with Chuck Dixon even going on record and stated that:

“...(he) finds solace in religion. He’s never been the cynical brooder that Bruce Wayne can be at times. Even though both went through the same childhood trauma Dick sought answers outside of himself. I think that’s the basis of his belief in Christianity.”

Though, it should be noted that religion was something that Marv Wolfman and George Perez has hinted at during The New Teen Titans. Now we just have more to go off of here. We also have the fact that he found himself working in law, though working as a police officer rather than a lawyer. The job itself became important and tied into many of the stories. There’s some more superficial things, such as Dick being a rambunctious kid, who instead of stealing patrol sticks from officers and breaking-and-entering like a certain New York born kid, would run away from home and ignore direct orders from Bruce.

From there, the next part is the fact that Dick gets a whole new city to call his own. While this isn’t overtly a copy of sorts, every superhero has their own city, we can look at the name. Bludhaven and Hell’s Kitchen. Heaven and Hell. Both are these horrible places, where people are just bad to be bad. Crime runs amuck. I don’t really know how to put it into words, but it’s basically a sort of “worst possible city a person can be in, and it’s up to this guy in a mask to make this city a better place.” Bludhaven was actually a really great addition for Nightwing though. Everything was really a good addition for his mythos, but this was probably my favorite.

Then we have the rogue gallery.

Nightwing really didn’t HAVE a rogue gallery before his solo title. And that makes sense, because he was either fighting Batman villains or Teen Titans villains. The only villain that would be in his gallery currently would be like Deathstroke, and even then, that’s up for debate for some people.

Blockbuster is an obvious comparison to Kingpin. Up and coming Crime lord who is trying to take over their city through force and intimidation. Bribing officers, and having high-leveled officials under his thumb. He has a wide range of underlings, and often hires assassins to take out the hero when he starts to interfere with his plans. They can both be placed as an archenemy to their respective hero.

Shrike was an attempt at making a Bullseye, a mysterious identity psycho who has a personal vendetta against the hero due to past experience with them. Both are deadly in the arts of killing, and are quite successful in that field.

Nite-Wing I feel was an attempt at making a Punisher type character. An anti-hero with a twisted ideology that comes in clash with the hero and has at one point worked with the hero. Although, as we know, Nite-Wing fell more to one side in regards to Nightwing, becoming more and more of a villain, as opposed to the Punisher who fell to the other side with Daredevil and actually helped a good amount of the time - albeit still a thorn in DD’s side.

Amygalda could be seen as a Gladiator type character. A misunderstood character with a good heart, and not necessarily do the right thing but more so live a normal life, but can’t because of personal demons - whether it be mentally or physically. Both are adversaries to the hero when they are unable to keep that other side dormant. The hero is more willing to talk to them than straight up slug fest every time - though that is a thing that happens.

During the Love and Bullets storyline and the Hunt for Oracle storyline, we have Helena Bertinelli as this Elektra type character. Not to say she became Dick’s college girlfriend who left after her father died only to become the world’s deadliest assassin. That'd be overkill. Huntress instead became this sort of “femme fatale” who showed up to cause havoc in Dick’s love life, and his blossoming relationship with Barbara at the time. She was this dark and mysterious character who showed Dick this other side of addressing the world. Their relationship was built on that adrenaline, and who’s to say that he didn’t actually love her too. I’m sure if Dixon continue writing, that probably would have been touched upon again.

These, to me, were the biggest ones. I’m sure you can probably draw more comparisons that are maybe just as much as a stretch as some of these. I couldn’t help to see some of these comparisons though while rereading it again for the hundredth time.

[myhahnestopinion]

REVIEW: Avengers - Endgame

Unlike the many imitators that followed in its industry-redefining wake, the Marvel Cinematic Universe has always been clearly building towards something. Universal infamously attempted a shared film series centered on its famous monsters without considering what reason such monsters would ever have for coming together. DC unsuccessfully sought to start with crossovers to quickly inflate a universe before finding they were far more assured taking things in more individualized steps. Since that first post credits scene where Samuel L. Jackson’s Nick Fury pops in to namedrop the Avengers Initiative though, the MCU established the story it wanted to tell and, while suffering the occasional hiccup, meticulously expanded its scope in service of that singular pursuit. As the tagline for the culmination of said execution ominously states, part of the journey is the end. In Avengers: Endgame, it’s the most important part. In contrast to the careful worldbuilding of the 22-film saga leading up to the movie event a full decade in the making, Endgame throws caution, consistency, and clarity to the wind and does whatever it takes to bring the MCU to an epic end.

A satisfying ending does not need to be surprising. Even the distressing ending of the prior Avengers installment, Infinity War, was not successful as a twist of the villain winning, but as a fulfillment of the stakes promised by the Infinity Stones set-up thus far. Similarly, there was an unspoken understanding of that ending’s implications lingering under the surface through all the internet’s various responses to it. After all, the fact that there was a fourth Avengers film in the works (as well as sequels to Spider-Man, Doctor Strange, and box office all-timer Black Panther), and the fact that the cataclysmic snap was only ever the catalyst for the original comic book storyline, negated a certain ability to surprise. Yet, the anxiety around spoilers for Avengers: Endgame is entirely understandable, and perhaps necessary. Much like Infinity War, Endgame exists less as a film and more as a string of crowd-pleasing moments meant to elicit gasps and cheers from an indoctrinated crowd. To that end, practically any discussion of specific or vague plot points in a review would do a disservice to a review’s purpose; i.e. to suggest whether the make-up of a film will delight, inform, bore, or aggravate the reader.  The film’s delight stems from experiencing jaw-dropping events in the moment, even as these events only satisfy because the proper set-up is already available for ready viewing. It makes no effort to cater to anyone other than its anticipatory crowd. Therefore, a non-spoiler review of Avengers: Endgame exists only to make one statement: will the movie be a pleasing experience for those who have followed the saga thus far. And Endgame most assuredly is.

Endgame takes full advantage of everything at its disposal in order to create this delightful experience. Like previous crossovers, the film’s major success is in watching its ensemble set of well-defined personalities quipping, tiffing, and co-operating with one another. The best of that success for the MCU has always been Iron Man and Captain America, played by Robert Downey Jr. and Chris Evans respectively. Born of differing heroic philosophies, but always inevitably brought together by overwhelming threats, the dynamic between the two heroes has long been the most captivating and insightful aspect of the entire cinematic universe. Downey and Evans bring their all to their performances here, each clearly fueled by a gratitude for everything the MCU has given them. The MCU, in turn, rewards them for seeing its planned 10 year story to completion. The heroes outside of that duo have more mixed results, stemming from their more inconsistently written roles, namely Thor (Chris Hemsworth) and Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson). Yet even without the added benefit of a consistent foundation, most of the material is gratifying, with only one or two small bits ringing false.

The film also builds off its own filmmaking language in some rewarding ways. The MCU has never been know for its technical bravery, with the composition of most of their films best described as “surprisingly competent given how much it has to juggle when combining numerous characters that rely on technology, magic, and technology so advanced it seems like magic into one palatable visual style.” Cinematography has no inherent meaning in the MCU; shots exists solely to give audiences a clear view of the plot points and characters beats that have meaning within them. However, Endgame still finds a way to utilize this past visual language to wring out plenty of emotional reactions; directors Anthony and Joe Russo finally implement callbacks as well as their returning screenwriters Christopher Markus and Stephen McFeely. Endgame thus feels like a proper celebration of the MCU’s grand success. The most sublime of such moments come through getting to poke a little fun at some of the expansive universe more maligned elements. It’s some well needed self-awareness for a franchise that can cop to a few mistakes considering everything it has created.

The scale of the MCU, both in-story and on the real-world production side, is what makes the most surprising part of Endgame its willingness, and perhaps even eagerness, to blow up everything that came before in service of this singular film. Part of what makes a story reaching its endgame so thrilling is the potential to make massive upheavals to the status quo, and Endgame embraces such opportunity. The film’s logic, even internally, is utter hogwash, playing fast and loose with storytelling rules whether they were established 5 films ago or 5 minutes. Its plot (which, again, shall remain unspoiled here) is the most convoluted of any the universe has offered, utilizing numerous contrived conveniences to keep fans cheering. The film is far more thematically muddled than its predecessor, ignoring many of its more complicated implications and forsaking rich narrative material in order to pack in as many fan-requested moments as possible into its three-hour runtime. The extent to which any of this matters is debatable; there is absolutely value in a film that exists solely to provide as widespread of laughter and applause as possible. But for all its marketing and subsequent perception as an endpoint, the MCU will live on as soon as July, when Sony releases Spider-Man: Far from Home. The film’s devil-may-care destruction of continuity and cohesion, while absolutely entertaining, can’t help but feel ill-advised if the Marvel Studio experiment is to continue. Maybe Avengers: Endgame should have made its part of the journey the end. Or, perhaps, after a decade of entertaining adventures and inspiring characters leading to a movie this epic and affecting, we can trust that, even if Marvel chooses not to protect its universe, it’ll be damn sure to avenge it.

Avengers: Endgame is in theaters now.

[davidmann95]

I haven't been able to tolerate a comics news site since ComicsAlliance shut down so what news out of SDCC is actually worth knowing about?

I’ve gotten so many questions regarding SDCC-related news that I figured I’d just do one big post, and this seems as opportune an ask to build that off of as any. To kick off, in terms of news that’s not for me but is a big deal, there’s a trailer for the next season of Doctor Who, and Star Wars: Clone Wars is shockingly coming back for a final reduced season years after the fact. Congrats to the fans of both franchises! Plus yesterday we got the announcement of Orlando and Foreman’s Electric Warriors for DC (as well as Orlando’s Dead Kings with Matt Smith at Aftershock Comics) and the Wonder Woman/Justice League Dark October crossover.

So first and foremost in terms of the reaction it picked up, OH MY GOD:

It’s like the Bat In The Sun team handed over their production to their shitty kids but made them work off a third of the budget. I kept seeing the jokes about it on Twitter, and I kept thinking they were surely hilarious exaggerations, AND NOT A ONE OF THEM EVEN SLIGHTLY WAS. At least it now makes sense why Hawk and Dove is here, given the Liefeld connection: this is 90s as helllllllllllllllllllllll, and while a part of me hopes it swerves unexpectedly in a couple seasons into Fun 90s DC with Starman and Wally West and an Electric Blue Superboy and Titans One Million, I can’t pretend I wouldn’t gleefully hatewatch this if it wasn’t behind a paywall. What it really comes down to is that, as I saw someone mention, the over-the-top content warning at the beginning isn’t actually by any means to get rid of anyone under 18, but specifically to appeal to them over anyone over it: there is nothing about this show not precision-crafted to appeal to teenagers watching something they technically aren’t supposed to, since anyone older than that will just laugh until the stars grow cold. And while it’s one line in particular that’s rightfully drawn all the attention, to me the clear defining moment is Beast Boy taking his big goofy dramatic leap, and you expect him to transform, but that ain’t happening (I fully expect he’ll just have claws and growl and do assorted Wolverine shit instead), because that kind of thing is for STUPID KIDS, whereas this is RAD. 

RAD, dare I say…to the EXTREME.

Also, the pilot Robin’s scene was presumably drawn from was written by Akiva Goldsman, Greg Berlanti, and Geoff Johns. So was it the guy behind Batman & Robin, the guy behind the CWverse, or the recent President of DC Comics who ushered FUCK BATMAN into the world? Because all three of those possibilities are equally hilarious. In any case, the rubicon has been crossed: easily one of the top ten, probably one of the five or so most iconic superheroes of all time said fuck in a piece of mass media. Where we go from here, nobody knows. But at the very least I’ll take the L for my original certainty that this would take place in the CW DCverse, because that clearly isn’t going to be the case. Though boy, imagine if it was. Personally I like to imagine this is a totally normal DCU, and suddenly going full 90s and murdering a bunch of people is their universe’s version of normal teen rebellion.

Additionally, it’s now seemingly set in stone that the fourth DC Universe live-action show alongside Titans, Doom Patrol, and Swamp Thing will be a Stargirl show where Courtney Whitmore learns about her legacy and tries to track down the Justice Society, described as in the flavor of Superman ‘78 and Wonder Woman. Again, if it wasn’t behind a paywall I’d check it out.

And before turning to comics proper, we learned from WB itself that there are no plans to idiotically pour millions into making a functional Justice League Snyder cut a thing, unsurprisingly making some of the worst people on the internet be just the absolute worst (I’m interested myself in it artistically even if I don’t think it would be very good, but at this point it would feel like a validation of some really rotten people’s behavior if this happened). Meanwhile the first trailer for the Dragon Ball Super movie dropped, and yeah, I’m still happy to see Broly. This looks big in a way Dragon Ball for all its action rarely gets, and seeing Paragus suggests Toriyama understood what worked about the original flick, which is a very good sign. Did they swap out Vic Mignogna as Broly though? Wouldn’t blame him, I know he’s said he hates the part, but surprising nonetheless. And the Spider-Man game dropped another trailer, along with a ‘Velocity’ bonus suit designed by Adi Granov.

The big comics news of the day was of course the long-awaited confirmation that Green Lantern is being relaunched - apparently as The Green Lantern - in November by Grant Morrison and Liam Sharp. What’s surprising is that Morrison’s currently insisting that since the last decade or so of the franchise has dealt with constant upheaval and cosmic apocalypse, his run is going to scale back down to a character-focused study of Hal (“He’s a loner and a drifter and he’s an unreconstructed man. It was nice to do that and to go a little bit old-fashioned with it. He doesn’t belong here at all, you know? He’s longing for the heavens, and to be back up as a Green Lantern. We’re doing Hal Jordan where, you know he’s a good cop, but is he really a good guy? And we’re looking into his relationships and how he deals with people. And also the fact that, if you’ve got a job as a space cop, it’s hard to be stuck on the planet Earth. He has other lives on other planets.”) amidst him going about his duties and dealing with weird alien crimes and space threats, such as stopping aliens from ‘parking’ a planet-sized artificial megastructure near a sun and causing damage to nearby worlds, and solving the murder of a gaseous lifeform.

I doubt it’ll necessarily stay there forever - his Batman and Action Comics runs, after all, were both initially marketed as staying on the smaller side by his standards, and the one idea we know of Morrison having once had for the Green Lanterns back in the day was making them a multiversal force. But it’s remarkable how, well, normal this sounds coming from Morrison. Clearly this must be a passion project if he’s doing a monthly again for the first time in 5 years, especially since DiDio mentioned he had to be persuaded (ultimately persuading himself as his attempts to brush off the proposition led to him thinking about the possibilities and rapidly talking himself into it) to make time for this amidst an incredibly busy schedule of surely more profitable and creatively unshackled projects, but on the surface level? This sounds like the closest Morrison has come since his JLA days to writing a regular superhero comic. At this point in his career, I’m very, very curious what that’s going to look like. Just hoping he read the King/Shaner oneshot on whatever reread he surely went through to catch up on current continuity. And also hoping this guy was right that it’ll turn out “the REAL construct that was limited by our willpower and imagination all along was…REALITY.”

On smaller notes:

* Kelly Sue DeConnick and Robson Rocha are taking over Aquaman, with an opening arc that shows him washing up amnesiac on an isle of forgotten sea gods. DeConnick seems to be like the Jeffs Lemire and Parker where my appreciation of their work is limited to very, very specific slivers: none of her Marvel superhero stuff I’ve read did anything for me even if I could see the talent behind it, but her Lois story in the last issue of The Adventures of Superman was pitch-perfect (and also had a great Aquaman bit!). This gets at least an issue from me.

* DC announced new titles for DC Ink and DC Zoom, including Cassandra Cain, Oracle, Dick Grayson, Creeper, and Wonder Woman books, while also announcing some artists for the existing titles.

* Geoff Johns is doing (ugh) Shazam with Dave Eaglesham, who showed off a really great, fun cover suggesting the possibility of a tonal shift away from Johns writing the absolute worst version of that character imaginable. On the likelihood of said possibility though, I think @intergalactic-zoo put it best. I might just check it out in trade if word of mouth is overwhelmingly positive, but then, lots of otherwise rational people liked or at least saw merit in his original crack at it with Gary Frank, and you were all deliriously, impossibly wrong back then, too.

* And finally, speaking of Johns, he’s doing Batman: Three Jokers as a 3-issue mini with Jason Fabok, a smart move given that is precisely as much as I’m willing to invest in this out of morbid curiosity. What’s really baffling though is that it’s being released under Black Label. It would seem to destroy the stated purpose of the line by immediately releasing Very Important Continuity Comics under it, but maybe this means Batman’s gonna follow in his protege’s footsteps and say a fuck. Anyway, I’m mostly just hoping it isn’t revealed Fun Golden Age Joker is actually not the original in order to rub out the prospect that he was ever truly anything but a terrifying sidekick-butchering murder machine at the center of very serious stories, because that feels to be like a real possibility. And absolute no question one of the three is gonna turn out to be the lost child of Marionette and Mime in Doomsday Clock.

[buckyscrystalqueen]

Still On The Road: Part 1

Pairings: Jason Momoa x Reader (AU/ SOA crossover)

Warnings: Swearing, angst, fluff, 

Word Count: 3,522

A/n: This is a continuation of the ‘Life On The Road’  series, which was a Chibs x Reader story I wrote a few months back. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hey, y’all. It’s your girls.” You said to the GoPro hanging off the rear view mirror so it could see not only you but Avery and Tink in the back seat as well. “So, Avery and I were talking today.” You started as you pulled off an exit toward the KOA you were planning on spending Fourth of July weekend at with your road parents, Todd and Stacy. “And we have a little debate going that we need your input on. As y’all know, I’m a Disney fanatic and for her fourth birthday, Miss Avery wants to make the trip over ta California ta go ta Disneyland. 

Now, y’all know how I feel about California, ain’t a secret but that ain’t the reason I wanna nix this Disney trip. My question to y’all is this. Is going ta Disney worth the price these days? I’m talkin’… at nearly hundred bucks a day, plus finding somewhere ta park the Palace, plus finding some where to board Tink for the full day at the park so she ain’t left in the house… is it worth making the trip over for a couple days in the park? Is the one in Florida a better idea? As always, leave your comments down below.”

“Let me go ta Disney!” Avery called out over you as you pulled into the KOA. You paused at the first stop sign and looked at the camera with a smile.

“But let’s be nice ta mama’s pocketbook, OK? Thanks y’all!” You and your daughter both blew the camera a kiss as you continued into the KOA to find your camping spot for the weekend. “You know your daddy’s gon’ be pissed.” Your sassy little girl shrugged as she put her books and toys away in her tote box in the back seat.

“I don’t care.” You nodded your head slowly as you pulled around the bend at a glacial speed so you wouldn’t hit anything or anyone. “I don’t like him.”

“Avery.” You said warningly as you pulled into the spot beside Todd and Stacy’s RV. “He’s still your daddy.”

“Then he shouldn’t’a left me.” She said as she met your eyes in the rearview mirror. You sighed to yourself as you put Sully, the pick-up truck you had bought a year before when Beast died, into park.

“Even still.” You said as you unbuckled your seatbelt. “You need to mind your manners when it comes to your daddy, like it or not. End’a the day, he’s still your daddy.” You looked back at her to unbuckle her and Tink’s seatbelts as she rolled her eyes. “Hey, be nice, missy or you won’t be going down to the pool with Pop for the movie tonight.”

“Yes, mama.” She said with a nod as she scooted out of her car seat. You shook your head as you grabbed your GoPro and laptop bag, and got out of the truck with a sigh.

“Hey munchkin!” Stacy said as she pulled open the back door of your truck to start in on her babysitting duties while you got your RV set up for the next couple days. “I missed you!”

“Nana, mama’s takin’ me ta Disney!” Avery cheered as she held onto Stacy’s shoulders while your friend helped her out of the high back seat.

“She is?” Stacy asked, enthusiastically as you picked up Tink and put her on the ground as well.

“We’re talking about it.” You said with your eyebrow raised as you turned on your iPad screen to put the stabilizing legs down before you unhitched the RV from your truck.

“Well, how ‘bout we go talk some more about it with Pop over some lunch and s’mores, huh?” Stacy said as she took your daughter’s hand, and turned her toward her campsite next door.

“Don’t you encourage her!” You called out as you hooked up the water line and the electricity. “You’re only gunna make it worse!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So yer comin’ ta California, an’ ye weren’t gon’ tell me?” Chibs asked, angrily not even an hour after you posted that weeks video blog on YouTube.

“Jesus Christ.” You grumbled as you worked on crystal orders on your bed while Avery slept peacefully in her bed on the other side of the living room in what used to be your garage. “Please tell me where ya heard me say that I was coming ta California…”

“Well if yer takin’ m’child ta Disney than yer obviously comin’ ta California.”

“And that’s where you’re wrong.” You said as you set the finished order to the side and grabbed the next box. “I haven’t decided if we’re going to Disney, which is why I put it up for a vote.”

“An’ ye’re no’ gon’ ask my opinion…” Your ex asked, which instantly set you off.

“No, Filip. I’m not going to ask your fucking opinion on it.” You snapped as you got off the bed to shut your bedroom door. “You fucking left us, remember? You decided that the Sons were more important than your real family, not me. That was your choice.”

“I didn’t ‘ave a choice, (Y/N)!” He retorted over you. “Ye all but pushed me away…”

“I did nothing of the sort.” You countered with a shake of your head. “I begged you to stay for your daughter. I begged you to stay with your family. But your other family was more important to you.”

“Ah, that’s bullshite!”

“No, what’s bullshit is you leavin’ your girlfriend and your two year old daughter to become a felon.” You could almost hear his jaw snap shut and you nodded your head. “Yea, ain’t got nothin’ there, do ya? Look, I ain’t the one that picked up and left in the middle of the night, here. I ain’t the one that then spent a year in jail for guns. I ain’t the one who made the choice, you did. You ain’t got no dog in this here fight, Chibs. You made your choice and ya have ta live with it. You chose the club over the chance of being a father to your daughter. No one forced this hand on you the way they did with Kerrianne. This is all on you. 

So don’t you dare think you can come in almost two years later, and try ta play daddy, again. Ain’t how it works. You get your phone calls an’ you’re more than welcome to meet us for visits, but you ain’t the parent, here no more. I am. So if I choose ta take my kid to fucking Disney for her birthday, then I’m gunna do it, and I ain’t gunna run it by you. If I do bring her to Cali, I’ll consider bringin’ her ta Charming, but again, that’s my call. I’m not legally obligated to do so, says so right in the custody papers. So I’d fucking watch your fuckin’ mouth with me, you hear?”

“Aye.” He growled in your ear, knowing that you were right in this situation. You sighed and leaned against your closet.

“I don’t want to be this bitch, Chibs.” You said with a shake of your head. “I don’t. But I can’t change what you did. This one ain’t on me.” Chibs stayed silent on the other end of the phone and if it hadn’t been for the slight tap of his whiskey glass against the phone, you would have thought he hung up.

“If ye come ta Disney for ‘er birthday, can ye come ta Charmin’? I miss ‘er.” You nodded your head slowly and looked down at your bare feet with a sigh.

“She’s really mad at you still.” You said as you glanced up at your closed bedroom door. “She doesn’t like you for leaving.”

“I know.” He breathed. “I know.”

“I’ll talk to her.” You said with a nod as you walked over to open your door since the yelling was over. “And I won’t make any promises because I don’t know if I can even afford Disney…”

“I’ll cover what ye can’t, luv.” He interrupted. “With good cash. Nothing made dirty. It’ll be from Caracara…”

“Yay. Porn money.” You sighed as you sat down on the end of your bed.

“I’m tryin’ ‘ere, luv.” He said with a hint of annoyance in his tone. “I’m fuckin’ tryin’.”

“I know.” You agreed with a nod. “I’m still thinking about it. It’s a lot to have to figure out in a short amount of time.”

“Alright, just… let me know then, aye?”

“Yea, I’ll let you know.” You agreed as you got up to look across your RV at Tink and Avery sleeping in the back room. “I’ll talk to you later.”

“Night, (Y/N).” You hung up the phone with a sigh and dropped your cell on your bed. Tink carefully picked her head up off Avery’s pillow and looked over at you, bringing a small smile to your face.

“’s’a’right, Tink.” You said softly with a nod. “Go back to bed, baby girl.” She huffed at you and curled back up beside your daughter, ever the protector of the little girl that stole both your hearts. With a smile, you turned back to your bed, and sat back down to finish your orders for the week.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Mommy, I go play with the pole?” Avery asked as she pointed across the pool at the group that was playing limbo. You sighed at your daughters choice of word as Stacy snickered in the lounge chair beside you.

“Just go, child.” You said as you waved your hand at her, sending her on her way to go and play.

“So you’re encouraging her to be a stripper?” Stacy teased once the three year old had run off.

“It’s good parenting.” You said with a shrug as you shifted on the lounge chair by the pool. “Maybe she’d get her father’s attention then.” The second the words left your mouth, you sighed and mentally scolded yourself. “That ain’t fair.” You backtracked. 

“Let me guess.” Stacy said as she looked over at you. “You talked to Chibs.” You nodded slowly as you watched Avery dip under the limbo bar by barely leaning backwards.

“He called last night.” You said as you looked over at your best friend. “Tried to yell at me for deciding to go to California without even telling him.”

“But you haven’t decided, officially.” She asked.

“Nope. I have a lot to look into first. But, after a little yelling, he did agree to help pay for it with porn money.”

“Wow.” Stacy said as she leaned back on her lounge chair under the big umbrella she had brought over from her RV. “What a class act.”

“Yea, you’re telling me.” You breathed in agreement. “I just can’t with him sometimes, you know? Like, he’s become a completely different person than the man that I originally met. You know, they say jail changes people but this is almost like a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde type transformation. And Avery wants nothing to do with him so I’m at the point where I have to ask myself do I force her to see her father or do I just let her justifiably hate her dad…”

“Ow! Mommy!” Your stomach turned at the sheer desperation in Avery’s voice, and your head whipped away from Stacy to watch her scrambling across the grass. “Mommy!”

“Avery?!” You called out as you lurched to your feet and ran across the pool deck as a man that had been working one of the grills picked your daughter up off the ground and ran toward the pool deck. Your daughter screamed in pain as hundreds of fire ants bit every inch of her body that they could.

“You’re OK.” The man said as he scrambled to brush the ants off her limbs as he brought her closer to you.

“It’s alright, Avery.” You said as you worked around the stranger to strip the ant covered bathing suit off your little girl. “It’s OK.”

“Can you hold her so I can get her back?” The man asked as he turned Avery toward you. You nodded and took your sobbing daughter from him.

“You’re OK, baby girl.” You cooed as you watched this stranger take control of a situation you otherwise wouldn’t have known how to handle.

“I need ice.” He said to who ever asked him if everything was OK. “Lots of it.”

“Mommy.” Avery sobbed as you searched her brown, curly hair for ants.

“I know, it’s almost done, baby.” You said as you fought back your tears to keep her calm.

“Is your campsite close so we can lay her down on the ice?” The man asked as he grabbed the bags of ice the man that had been working the kids games brought over for him. You nodded as you stood up with Avery in your arms and pointed in the direction your RV was thankfully just across the road.

“I got the bags.” Stacy said as she picked up Avery’s bathing suit off the deck by the strap. You nodded your head and rubbed your daughter’s back and legs to get any rogue ants off.

“Thank you.” You said as you finally looked up at the strangers gorgeous green eyes. The handsome gentleman smiled at you, and shrugged as he followed you with the ice.

“It’s nothing, ma’am.” He stopped for a moment to tell someone from his group to grab his bag from the truck before easily catching up with you and Stacy. “Do you know if she’s allergic to fire ants?” You shook your head and hesitated for Stacy to open your RV door for you.

“I sure hope not. Look out, Tink. Go lay down. We can lay her down here, and I have a couple ice packs in the freezer.” The man nodded as he pointed to the sink.

“We gotta wash her off real fast first. Get any venom on her off.” You nodded and headed into the bathroom by your bedroom as Stacy went to grab the ice packs from her freezer as well. You washed Avery from head to toe and your heart broke with every single angry red bite on her body. You toweled her off quickly and pulled her into your arms as Stacy came back in and put her ice packs on the counter for you before getting out of your way.

“Alright, this is gunna be really cold, baby girl.” You said as you shifted Avery in your arms to lay her down on the towel of ice the man had laid out on your couch. “But it’ll make it all better.”

“No!” Avery screamed.

“We gotta, baby.” You said as you pulled her arms from around your neck, and laid her down on the ice towel.

“Hey, look it’s not that bad.” He said with a smile. “Hey, can you tell me what your dog’s name is?” Avery looked up at him with tears in her eyes as he put his hand on her stomach to keep her in place on the couch so you could grab more towels and the ice packs.

“T-Tinkerbell.”

“Tinkerbell?” He said with an air of shock in his tone. “That’s a great name! So does that make you a Disney princess?” She nodded her head slowly as he took the towels from you and started to wrap them around more ice.

“Mommy’s… mommy’s takin’ me ta Disney.”

“She is?” He asked as he laid the towel across the angry red bites across her stomach and chest. “Wow! That sounds like so much fun! Who’s your favorite princess?” You smiled at his back and looked at the man that had walked up to your RV door.

“Jason?” He called out as he held up a red medics bag to show you.

“Yea.” The man that was helping your daughter said with a glance. “Thanks, bro. I’ll be back over there in a little while. Help them find that ant pile.” His friend nodded and passed him the bag before nodding at you and heading back over to the pool.

“Are you a doctor?” You asked as he pulled the bag over to his side and unzipped it.

“I used to be an EMT.” He said as he grabbed a couple squeeze and shake ice packs. “I live on the road now like you.” He said with a glance up at you. “But my digs aren’t as nice.” You smirked as you sat down on the couch by your daughter’s head.

“This was actually a gift.” You said as you looked around the RV you had called home for the past four years. “I started out with Tink in a 19 foot Scamp about eight years ago.”

“Oh, nice.” He said with a nod as he wrapped the last ice pack in a towel and put it on Avery’s leg. “I’ve been in a cab over slide in for about two years. It’s just me though.” He smiled as he sat back on the floor. “I’m Jason, by the way.”

“(Y/N), and this is Avery. It’s just the two of us and our dog in here.”

“Nice to meet you both.” He said as he shook your hand. “Sorry, it’s under such crappy circumstances.”

“Yea, understatement.” You agreed as you ran your fingers through your daughter’s hair and squished a rogue ant. “Thank you for your help, though.” You said again. “I would have had no idea what to do.”

“Ants are tough.” He said with a nod as he leaned his side against the couch. “Your first thought is to drown them, but that makes them bite harder. So you just wipe them off as fast as you can. Rinse whatever venom is left over, off, then cold compresses on and off every fifteen minutes. Benadryl and hydrocortisone cream will help the itch, and a good serving of ice cream will help cure anything else.”

“Well, who am I ta go against the doctors orders on that one?” You asked as you looked down at your traumatized daughter with a smile. 

“If it’s alright with you, do you care if I hang around for a little bit? Make sure she doesn’t have an extreme reaction?”

“Oh, absolutely.” You said with a nod. “I’d actually be more comfortable if you did. Can I get you anything? I don’t have beer here but I know Stacy and Todd do next door.”

“Just some water is fine.” He said with a smile. You nodded and got up to grab him a bottle of water as he turned his attention back to his patient. “So, have you ever been to Disney before?”

“No.” Avery said with a shake of her head as Jason subtly put his fingers on her wrist to check her pulse.

“No? Well you’re gunna have a great time. You’ll get to meet Mickey Mouse and Minnie. And even your favorite, Ariel! They’ll all be there.”

“It would be a birthday gift.” You said as you put his bottle of water down by his knee and sat back down on the couch.

“Wow. What a special birthday.” He said as he dug in his bag for a small notebook and a pen. “How old are you gunna be?”

“Four.”

“Wow!” He breathed as he wrote down her pulse so he could keep track of it later. “Such a big girl already.” She nodded at him as he took her temperature. “I went a long, long time ago.” He told her to distract her from the itch and the pain. You smiled to yourself and watched this stranger talk to and take care of your little girl as if she was the only other person in the room. When the fifteen minutes of ice was up, he gave her a dose of Benadryl and helped you cover every inch of her body in cortisone cream. The Benadryl knocked her out before she was completely covered and he helped you get her dressed in a light sundress and a pair of pull ups and into your bed with Tink laying protectively by her side.

“I can’t thank you enough for everything you’ve done.” You told Jason as you cleaned up the melted ice off the floor while he repacked his medic bag.

“It’s nothing.” He said with a shake of his head and a smile.

“Can I at least make you dinner as a thanks? I was going to do walking tacos because my kid is weird and doesn’t like hot dogs and we did hamburgers for lunch…”

“Walking tacos?” He asked as he put his water bottle in his bag and slung the strap over his shoulder. You nodded and smiled as you stood by your front door in front of him.

“I’d explain but I’m just gunna tell you to come back around 5:30 to find out. How about that?” He chuckled and nodded his head.

“Alright. I’ll take you up on that one, then. Just because I’m curious.”

“Well, bring your appetite. You’ll need it.”

Part 2

[the-elemental-sides]

I almost managed to go to sleep but then I started thinking about the origin of my Sanders Sides obsession, the genesis, the Atop the Fourth Wall series by Linkara (Lewis Lovhaug). Gosh, it’s been so long since I’ve watched it. Has anyone else even heard of it??

Getting into Sanders Sides was an easy transition because AT4W was also a series where the host dressed up like all (most of) his characters. There was 90s Kid, Harvey Finevoice, and like, others? There were lots of robots. And a magic gun! And an alcoholic musician from another dimension named Jaeris, he was my favorite.

See, AT4W is a comic book reviewing series, but I would always watch it for the storylines that focused on these characters. They were pretty incredible. The creator even kickstarted and made a full-length movie. It’s interesting to try to compare it to SS because they’re so different. Sanders Sides has slightly better acting and character portrayal because Thomas is on another level, but Lewis Lovhaug is also very good, and some of his writing and editing is the BEST, jeez. And because his stories involve multiple characters and villains and have higher stakes, the emotional points could get way more tense than Sanders Sides has ever been. But, at the same time, SS is sweeter and has better humor...

I wrote a fanfic based on AT4W back in 2014 at the peak of my obsession, and now here I am with a bunch of fantasy SS stories. Maybe I like this genre because I’m trying to capture the intrigue and hype of the science fiction stories from AT4W. The series was my introduction to strange internet productions + a lot of nerd culture and I had never really seen anything like it. I want to rewatch Atop the Fourth Wall and see if it holds up, and now I’m gonna consider what a crossover would be like...

[theserpentsadvocate]

Alrighty, pick any combination of these for the meme: Dumbledore, Grindelwald, Percival Graves, Hengist of Woodcroft, and Celeborn (I know you said you're not a big fan of his, so this one's extra optional. I would be interested in hearing your thoughts on him, though, even if they're negative.)

Sorry it took so long. In my defense, this is long.

Aaaand in my defense about that… yeah, I’ve got nothing, I’m just like this.

Sorry about the lack of Tolkien ranting, it’s mostly meh-ing instead. There’s some ranting in the Grindelwald section, though. XD

Dumbledore

What I like about them

Okay, I love red hair, and Dumbledore in his younger years (like middle age) with his loooong auburn hair and his loooong auburn beard just does it for me a purely aesthetic way. Like I would sit and stare at him for hours.

What I dislike about them

There’s the ordinary list, manipulation and self-righteousness and the Grindelwald debacle, but honestly the biggest thing is Snape. I don’t care honestly what bullshit excuse there was, YOU DON’T EMPLOY ABUSIVE TEACHERS, like if he really has to be at Hogwarts give him some administrative position or some shit.

Favourite moment

The bit after Umbridge fires Trelawney and is trying to kick her out, and Dumbledore tells her that she can fire whoever she wants but she can’t make them leave the castle.

Least favourite moment

His opening line when he meets Harry in the nebulous train station afterlife place makes me cringe a little bit. It’s probably 100% me, but it feels… trite, and uncomfortable, and honestly like something my mom would say, which is probably the real reason why I hate it.

A situation with this character that I want to see explored more

I’d really love to see his relationship and/or interactions with Aberforth explored more. (Not by JKR. She needs to drop HP like a hot potato and MOVE BACK.)

An interesting AU for this character

Somewhere on my computer I have half a rantfic about the premise where Regulus became Dumbledore’s spy instead of Snape, and while it’s 500% about my Regulus feels, there’s some interesting stuff in there about Dumbledore, specifically how the dynamic changes when his spy is someone who has

actually renounced

Voldemort and isn’t just out for personal gain/revenge.

A crossover

I’m really not a huge crossover person, honestly, but I guess it would be interesting to see how he’d fare in Discworld?

OTP (or OT3+ etc…. just… favourite ship)

The only person I really ship him with is Grindelwald, and I’m often ambivalent about that.

Other ships?

Nah.

BROTP

With McGonagall, probably.

NOTP

Dumbledore/Harry. Gag me.

An assortment of headcanons!

-He liked Elphias Doge, but never really considered him the kind of friend that Elphias considered him. Elphias was convenient and pleasant and somewhat in awe of him, but he never really considered them to be on the same level.

Grindelwald

What I like about them

I imagine he was incredibly attractive.

What I dislike about them

Well, there was the part where he thought people like me were second-class citizens who needed to be ruled over by people like him for our own good, so.

Also, Johnny Depp. Ugh.

Favourite moment

When he told Voldemort off. That was epic and really poignant.

Least favourite moment

Ariana Dumbledore’s death is painful to think about.

A situation with this character that I want to see explored more

What did he do in Nuremburg? What exactly led to his… I don’t know, change of heart? Greater self-knowledge? Changed perspective? that he demonstrates when he’s talking to Voldemort? I want to know what kind of introspection happened there.

An interesting AU for this character

Here’s an idea, what if he was played by literally anyone other than Johnny Depp?

A crossover

Yeah, I got nothing.

OTP (or OT3+ etc…. just… favourite ship)

I ship him with Dumbledore sometimes.

Other ships?

Not really.

BROTP

Erm. He doesn’t really interact with anyone in canon aside from the Dumbledores, Bathilda, and Voldemort, so I guess Dmbledore again? Only not. I’m interested in it; I don’t support it.

NOTP

With Voldemort? I’ve never seen it, but I just generally assume everyone gets shipped with Voldemort. Fandom is strange.

No, wait! Grindelwald/Johnny Depp.

An assortment of headcanons!

-He’s blond.

-When he was younger he had a small trim beard.

Percival Graves

I have not actually seen FBaWtFT. I was already kind of done with the extra material by then and I’m still not at a point where I can watch movies with Johnny Depp in them without feeling sick to my stomach (although it’s improved). I will watch it at some point, though.

Hengist of Woodcroft

What I like about them

There’s a lot of room for fanon interpretations.

What I dislike about them

Even before she started This Shit ™, I was always… dubious about Rowling’s extracanonical material - fourteen-year-old Riley was firmly of the opinion that if you didn’t put it in the books, you couldn’t call it canon. (Although obviously it was optional for fans to use.) I still pretty much think that, and sometimes I feel boxed in by interview/extra material canon, which results in a… complicated relationship with characters who are optionally canon. (Full disclosure, I know who he is and that he found Hogsmeade, and I basically ignore everything else.)

Favourite moment

The founding of Hogsmeade is obviously a highlight.

Least favourite moment

???? Did he… do anything else, canonically?

A situation with this character that I want to see explored more

So, how did the founding of Hogwarts and the founding of Hogsmeade coincide? (No, ignore whatever Rowling said.) Did one come first? Was Hogwarts taking advantage of an all-magical town, or did Hogsmeade originate as a sort of wizarding college town? Does one predate the other by a few generations, and how did the development of the latter influence the older institution? If they were at roughly the same time, what were his relationships like with the founders, as a group and individually? If they were more spaced out, how did the founders interact with his legacy, or vice versa?

An interesting AU for this character

Depending on your definition of canon, a bunch of what I mentioned above could be considered an AU. Off the top of my head, erm - oh, I think @iceberg-hootenanny said something about an outer space AU, I could actually go for that. Maybe he’s setting up the first real settlement on Mars or Genesis or Xenon 5 or something.

A crossover

Yeah, I dunno.

OTP (or OT3+ etc…. just… favourite ship)

I have no ships for him until just now, but totally off-the-wall, what if he’s Rowena’s husband?

Other ships?

I usually ship primarily intra-founders pairings, but what the hell, let’s throw Hengist in the mix.

BROTP

Idk, I feel like he could have a particularly jocular commitment to Creating New Things! and Achieving Your Goals! that I also ascribe to certain versions of Godric, so that might go over well.

NOTP

I think my standard NOTP with HP characters who I’ve never heard of ships for is going to be That Person/Voldemort. :) It’s a good catch-all answer.

An assortment of headcanons!

-He had brown hair and a beard.

-Usually carried a staff or walking stick.

Celeborn

What I like about them

Okay, so I generally focus on the fact that he was kind of snippy to Gimli, but let’s be fair here - he apologizes. Especially given the depths of Elf-Dwarf racism (and don’t get me wrong here, in their long and complicated history it is my firm opinion that the Dwarves got the worst of it and the Elves are more at fault) and his personal unpleasant experiences, that’s not a small thing.

What I dislike about them

Honestly - and I’m fully prepared, if not resigned, to be crucified for this - I almost exclusively find the Sindar really boring.

Favourite moment

Again, probably that apology.

Least favourite moment

I’ve always found the extended goodbye scene with the swan boat kind of unnecessary and boring, tbh. *wince*

A situation with this character that I want to see explored more

What the fuck was he doing during the whole Fourth Age after Galadriel left? When did he eventually go to Eressea? He did eventually go to Eressea, right?

An interesting AU for this character

It’s not an AU, per se, but it would be interesting to see his reactions to whatever was going to happen in Return of the Shadow.

A crossover

With Sesame Street. :)

OTP (or OT3+ etc…. just… favourite ship)

I’m boring and like canon pairings, insofar as I’m invested.

Other ships?

Are there other ships with Celeborn? I’ve actually never seen any.

BROTP

I’m tempted to say Mablung, but that’s essentially because I will shoehorn Mablung into any fucking content I can manage. I guess Gandalf is the obvious choice? (Can I say Galadriel? I think the non-romantic aspects of their relationship might be interesting, insofar as I’m interested.)

NOTP

Someone inform me what the non-canon Celeborn ships are; I don’t know any.

An assortment of headcanons!

-He used to hang out with Luthien. They weren’t super close, but they were low-key buddies.

[poisonappletales]

I'm a little confused. Is the Unknown who answers questions here the one who will appear in BatW, or is it the one from DTTR? Because I thought they were different. Like different versions of the same person or same person/different dimensions. (And I always got the feel that Unknown in DTTR was a bit... I hate to say vulnerable but that fits best, which compared to the BatW version.)

Hello, Anonymous! The Unknown answering questions here is indeed the one from Don’t Take This Risk.

If this was the one from Beauty and the War (X Playing Pieces), he wouldn’t be able to make quite so many modern references! There’s also a couple of other differences that would make them similar yet distinct - same person/different dimensions, as you said. That description’s right on the nose.

When I let Unknown interact with the Beauty and the War characters, you could say I’m sort of breaking the fourth wall and doing a non-serious crossover.

Now, here’s something I do want to clarify. When I bring Unknown out to play, I’m usually taking him “post-game” - after the events of that very short game.

When he talks to you (the ones giving the asks), I have him remember what’s been asked and who’s talking to him.  He has this sort of meta-knowledge that you were the “player character” in his world - or, depending on what you say, a witnessing spectator.

With that in place, here’s something I want to ask you.

Who do you think Unknown is?

Here are a few common theories I hear from fans:

Theory 1:

He’s a troubled man, suffering from suicidal thoughts and depression.

Theory 2:

He’s a manipulative scoundrel who’s trying to lure you into his bed.

Theory 3:

He’s a cannibal who wants to eat you. Literally.

Theory 4:

He’s a vampire or some other supernatural creature.

There are others, some of which mix the above. I welcome all theories, though I won’t confirm which one is really accurate until Beauty and the War (X Playing Pieces) is finished. (As you well know, Unknown’s face and identity will be revealed in it!)

However, there are certain aspects of him that are definite and easy to catch in Don’t Take This Risk. (Warning: Very mild spoilers for anyone who hasn’t played that game yet!)

For instance, you come to his house. The first thing he does is try to hug you. In general, he’s very touchy. Make certain choices, and he forcefully kisses you. This guy can be aggressive and dominant. Oh, he’ll let you sit on top of him, but he’s not really someone you can call docile or shy. But it’s not like aggressive, dominant people can’t have vulnerable moments, too.

Going back to Unknown’s movie outing, he’s doing the same thing with Ambrosia, being forward and a little too handsy.

In Don’t Take This Risk, he speaks lovingly, adoringly - full of compliments and cheeriness. In that movie outing, he’s doing the same thing there.

If he generally seems more vulnerable in Don’t Take This Risk, it’s probably because of how you first met. Straight off the bat, you know this is someone who intended to call the suicide hotline. (Or did he? There’s a fun theory over here you ought to check out…)

When he realizes it’s a mistake, what does he do? He tries to play it off as a “prank” and talk like he’s fine. During that movie outing, Ambrosia doesn’t know what he’s thinking, and he’s certainly not going to announce something like that to the world. However, you might see that he hints at it (i.e. telling her that she makes the house seem a little less lonely).

Unknown isn’t someone who mopes around and acts depressed in the public eye. If you met him as strangers, you probably wouldn’t suspect anything.

In Don’t Take This Risk, Unknown is coming from a point where he’s about to take the plunge. Coming post-game in that movie outing, you could say he’s past that crucial stage, that desperate night. (I’m not saying that he does or doesn’t have suicidal feelings still. But he’s not planning to act on them right now. Maybe Unknown knows he just can’t do anything harmful in this strange meta-space. It’s forbidden, shh.) 

How does Unknown see Ambrosia?

In many ways, you could say he’s treating her like the AU (alternate universe) version of the player. Or maybe he’s seeing her like the AU version of someone he knows in his past. Or he may not be doing either of those. Feel free to theorize here, too.

Speaking of his past…why exactly do you think Unknown wants to die?

Since Don’t Take This Risk was made for a 48-hour game jam, I wasn’t able to give you enough info to figure that out for good. Sure, you get fragments, but it’d be extremely hard to piece together his past and his motivations from those. 

But I do love it when people wonder something along the lines of: “How can someone like him have trouble finding love?” Because you should wonder that. When you see him, isn’t he cool and alluring, fun and charming? He’s talkative and attractive (from what you can see of him) and seductive. Why doesn’t he have someone?

When you meet him in person, he acts with more confidence and charm than you might have expected. But he’s clearly going through something and he needs you there. In that movie outing…well, he might still be going through something, but there’s also something missing from the equation. (For one thing, he knows he’ll live to see another day - and another and another while he’s “trapped” in this meta-space. He has time to kill.)

Here’s the important thing about Unknown that I mentioned before:

Don’t expect the expected from this man.

As for his Beauty and the War (X Playing Pieces) version…I don’t know which Act he’s coming from, but if that guy was the one going on that movie trip with Ambrosia, believe me. You’d see him doing something differently…

I hope that cleared up your confusion, Anon! Let me know if you have any more questions. Unknown’s a pretty complex guy (not helped by all the mystery he’s shrouded in, I’m sure!), but here’s something that might help.

If you decide to run through Don’t Take This Risk again, turn off your chosen voice and just read the words he’s saying. Observe his actions, too, and you should see him a little clearer. The sound of a voice can lead you to form certain opinions, certain impressions, ones that may not always be true…

(P.S. I don’t know if this will be of any use, but @godtierwallflower​ made a TVTropes page for Don’t Take This Risk a long while back! Check it out if you have the time.)

[painted--elf]

I know its pretty late but my brain was like: you know that the ‘tomarrow’ song from annie is always linked to cables past/his daughter? How about we make ideas for fics that we’ll probably never write?

And I wrote it down so you all can see what my brain desided to do.

Here’s several ways it could go:

Way number 1

The hard knock life (reprise) remix ft Firefists

Deadpool3 is deadpool annie crossover with music cues that only Wade can hear.

Russel gets taken in by Cable, Wade, metal husband #2 (cause i cant spell his name right now), and Vanessa (maybe). Russel gets a (normal) dog and alludes to that his life before he was adopted was actually pretty similar to the muscial

Way number two:

The sun will come out tomarrow, in either time-line you telepathic fuck

Deadpool family settle in for a night of musicals and bad jokes.

The playlist is :

West side story, Mary poppins, The sound of music, Fiddler on the roof, Rocky horror picture show, Grease, Willie wonka and the chocolate factory, Annie, Monty Python's The Meaning of Life, The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, Footloose, and Little Shop of Horrors.

They eventually find themself at Annie. Cable starts breaking down with the “sun will come out tomarrow”. Everyone is a little panicked. Wade understands because fourth wall flashbacks baby, but has to explain whats going on without making people feel bad (People being Russel). Eventually they comfort him by singing it in a diffrent way. And Cable is still teary eyed but he’s greatful for his new family.

Way number three:

Martin Charnin would have hated this fic so much

Just full on annie au:

Russel is annie, a little angry boy who wants his family to come find him. Ms hannigan is the headmaster and the orphans are the orphans. Sandy is Lockjaw (because why not add a touch more maddness into this very stupid idea). Cable is Daddy warbucks (with a touch more sadness because his family died a while ago and he never emotionally recovered) and Deadpool is Grace farell (a very sassy seceratry who went into it at entry level so he can pay for his hospital bills but now is basically Cable’s bffwb and a paycheck, is married but in an open relationship, does mercanary stuff sometimes, can tell that they need to save Russel from a mile away and goes off to save him from the orphanage). Metal husband is Drake (the butler) (who is almost always with his very emo lesbian daughter and her adorable gf from a boarding school).

All the other characters there too and the main sub plots of Deadpool2 but the main plot is annie the movie.

[aion-rsa]

Riverdale Season 5 Episode 1 Review – Chapter 77: Climax

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This RIVERDALE review contains spoilers.

Riverdale Season 5 Episode 1

“Clearly our last two weeks of high school are going to be fraught…”

Friends, on this day we find this country starting a new chapter, one that is full of hope and excitement for the future.

I am of course referring to the airing of Riverdale‘s season premiere, a somewhat wheel-spinning, melodramatic affair that feels more like the closing pages of a book than the start of another story.

And that’s because it is precisely that. This episode was a leftover from last year, filmed but not completed production until the pandemic lockdown was over. As such it thrusts us into the start of the endgame of last season’s storylines — namely the fallout of the Betty and Archie kiss, Mr. Lodge’s illness and how he is using vigilantism to cope with it, the mysterious (and suitably anachronistic videotapes) arriving at the doorsteps of Riverdale residents, and the gang prepping for their imminent post-high school lives.

There’s a lot to be told here until the show finishes telling this specific story. Writers Ace Hasan and Greg Murray handle this arguably thankless task with aplomb, squeezing out the necessary exposition needed to push the plot points towards their approaching conclusion while shoehorning in a (now unfortunate) Katy Keene tie-in. To be fair, it’s a solid episode. Just one that, through no fault of its own, doesn’t really work as a season premiere.

That minor gripe aside, there’s a lot to enjoy here. First and foremost are Archie’s struggles. It was wise for the showrunners to make the character realize that he is a bit of a rudderless dolt. Addressing this most obvious of character flaws makes our oft-shirtless protagonist that much more of a likable guy. He’s discovered that while he has some options — running the gym is his best bet — he also needs to clear his head, and getting out of Riverdale would help with that greatly.

Now that the Navy isn’t an option, and he’s questioning his whole life. This results in his destroying his relationship with Veronica by telling her about his illicit kiss with Betty. One, it should be mentioned, that made Betty feel super uncomfortable…although that could’ve just been the terrible song Archie wrote for her.

The deception is enough to blow apart the pair’s “endgame” status…at least until after the upcoming time jump and their old flame is inevitably rekindled. (Even though we know that Veronica will be married to the jerky Chad Gekko, another Katy Keene character climbing aboard the Riverdale express). Much drama will ensue, but in the show’s now, they are done. What’s the over/under until we see Veronica performing “Bittersweet Symphony” at La Bonne Nuit?

Elsewhere, the Choni ship (I am in my forties and just wrote those words!) is threaten by the ghost of the greatest thing to ever happen on Riverdale: The Blossom family’s Maple Syrup Blood Feud. It’s not that Toni’s Nana has an issue with her granddaughter’s sexuality — although she kinda does — but more that Toni is dating a sworn enemy of the Lopez family. As much as I love me some Shakespeareian motifs, these characters regularly deal with serial killers and cult members. So the family drama here isn’t really very compelling, you know?

The most interesting thing happening on Riverdale right now is also its most frustrating, the saga of The Auteur. Betty didn’t tell Jughead about Archie’s shitty song or the kiss because in her mind, it wasn’t that big of a deal. Just a sort of awkward thing that happened in the moment that isn’t worth blowing up her life over. Adult decision making at its finest! Whether or not this choice impacts her relationship with Jughead, and I bet it does, will be revealed soon. Right now though they are doing what they love the most, investigating a mystery. One that really needs to ramp up the excitement and fast.

David seems to be too obvious of a choice to be the identity of the Auteur. It also goes against the show’s habit of making the protagonist someone we already know. Episodes from last season have shown us Charles and Chip plotting together for a yet to be revealed reason. To a lesser degree, Evelyn Evernever is a possibility too. But this episode raises the most intriguing potential suspect yet.

Jellybean Jones.

Think about it. She is a cipher of a character, one who would have had access to Jughead’s stories and knows about almost every aspect of his life. Perhaps she is making these videos because she is scared about him going away to school. Maybe they are some sort of bizarre revenge plot cooked up by Jellybean and Gladys Jones against Jughead and FP? By making Jellybean the auteur this creates more drama for the ever-complicated Jughead and gives him a personal tragedy that mirrors what Betty experienced with her father. I truly feel that Jellybean being at David’s film fest/rave by herself (we never see her friends she is supposedly with) is much more than a red herring. Time will tell. But we need to see some clarity on what the motives behind these tapes are, ASAP.

And so Riverdale is back. While we are watching the blending of the programs fourth and fifth seasons unfold due to real-life production concerns, it remains the most welcome of escapes.

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Riverdale Rundown

• This episode was filmed before production on the series was shut down due to Covid-19. As such, the next few installments will cover the gang’s final weeks at Riverdale High before jumping ahead seven years — which will occur in what was originally intended to be last year’s season finale. And you thought Doctor Who was timey wimey.

• The above explanation also explains why a character from a cancelled CW series — K.O. Kelly from Katy Keene — plays such a crucial role in tonight’s proceedings.

• Speaking of Katy Keene, that show took place during the time period that Riverdale is about to jump ahead to — one in which Hiram Lodge has completely recovered from his mystery disease.

• Did anyone else find Archie’s constant referring to K.O. as bro endearing? And OF COURSE these two characters were given a shirtless workout montage/steam room scene. Besides, what’s an episode of Riverdale without plenty of gratuitous objectification?

• Archie really did himself no favors by neglecting to mention to Veronica how Betty shut him down after his attempt to woo her. Communication is the key to a solid, healthy relationship, fam!

• Ashleigh Murray’s Josie McCoy was a main character on Katy Keene, yet as of this writing it is unclear if she will return to Riverdale or not this season. (And for the record, Archieverse showrunner Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa hasn’t permanently shut the door on some sort of Katy Keene revival either).

• The cancelled fifth season of Chilling Adventures of Sabrina would have been a major crossover with Riverdale. Although we were denied that magic, if the above official key art is to be believed, it does seem that we will be getting some major supernatural happenings is season. Afterlife with Archie anyone?

• Archie’s scars from his bear attack really come and go, don’t they?

• Kett Turton returns tonight as David, the owner of the Blue Velvet video store. His perfect recreation of David Lynch’s cadence and mannerisms combined with the costume department seemingly raiding the Twin Peaks mastermind’s wardrobe is a perfect illustration of how Riverdale commits to its goofiness 100%.

• I’m not sure, but I think the Black Hood movie being shown in room 317 is a very subtle reference to the Miss Saigon song that also takes place in that location.

• In a nice callback, some of the tickling videos like the ones Kevin and Fangs made are being shown at the film party/rave. (Along with snippets of exploitation/art flicks clearly inspired by the works of Kenneth Anger and Herschell Gordon Lewis).

• “You had me at snuff film.” Here’s hoping Kevin Keller never changes.

• Cheryl is at her most Cheryl tonight, melodramatically spewing lines like “perhaps your camera will capture the sublime tragedy of my life” with an effortlessness that would make Bette Davis proud.

• Putting Fizzle Rocks in the punchbowl, classic Reggie Mantle.

• Further evidence of how this show is, to quote The Tragically Hip, chronologically fucked up, the songs played at the prom were Sixpence None the Richer’s “Kiss Me,” BoDeans’ “Closer to Free” (itself the theme song to another popular teen show, Party of Five), Collective Soul’s “The World I Know,” Mazzy Star’s timeless “Fade Into You,” and Talking Heads’ “Psycho Killer.” Would any of these songs actually be played at a prom taking place in whatever year in the 2010’s this series is set in? Your guess is as good as mine.

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